10 Convenient Ways To Eliminate Food Poisoning With Your Microwave
Microwave ovens can play an important role at mealtime, but special care must be taken when cooking or reheating meat, poultry, fish, and eggs to make sure they are prepared safely. Microwave ovens can cook unevenly and leave "cold spots," where harmful bacteria can survive. For this reason, it is important to use the following safe microwaving tips to prevent food-borne illness.
Microwave Cooking
1. Arrange food items evenly in a covered dish and add some liquid if needed. Cover the dish with a lid or plastic wrap; loosen or vent the lid or wrap to let steam escape.
2. Large cuts of meat should be cooked on medium power (50%) for longer periods. This allows heat to reach the center without overcooking outer areas.
3. Stir or rotate food midway through the microwaving time to eliminate cold spots where harmful bacteria can survive.
Microwave Defrosting
4. Remove food from packaging before defrosting. Do not use foam trays and plastic wraps because they are not heat stable at high temperatures.
5. Cook meat, poultry, egg casseroles, and fish immediately after defrosting in the microwave oven because some areas of the frozen food may begin to cook during the defrosting time.
Reheating In The Microwave
6. Cover foods with a lid or a microwave-safe plastic wrap to hold in moisture and provide safe, even heating.
7. After reheating foods in the microwave oven, allow standing time. Then, use a clean food thermometer to check that food has reached 165 °F.
Proper Containers
8. Only use cookware that is specially manufactured for use in the microwave oven and that is labeled for microwave oven use.
9. Plastic storage containers such as margarine tubs, take- out containers, whipped topping bowls, and other one-time use containers should not be used in microwave ovens. These containers can warp or melt, possibly causing harmful chemicals to migrate into the food.
10. Microwave plastic wraps, wax paper, cooking bags, parchment paper, and white microwave-safe paper towels should be safe to use. Do not let plastic wrap touch foods during microwaving.
Copyright (c) Terry Nicholls. All Rights Reserved.
Submitted by:
Terry Nicholls
Terry Nicholls is the author of the eBook "Food Safety: Protecting Your Family From Food Poisoning". For more tips like these, and to learn more about his book, visit his website at http://tinyurl.com/3fr2tyourguides@cogeco.ca
Wednesday, June 3, 2009
Health
10-Question Checklist to Select the Right Brain Fitness Program for You
Unless you have been living in a cave, you have read by now multiple articles about the brain training and brain exercise craze: sudoku, Nintendo BrainAge, multiple online games, software like MindFit and Posit Science... How do you know which of them can help you more, or whether you need any of them? Well, that's why we are publishing the SharpBrains Checklist below, to help you navigate through the overwhelming and conflicting media reports and company announcements. We have spent over 18 months interviewing scientists and reviewing available Brain Fitness and Exercise Programs worldwide, and we are going to share with you, right now, the research-based criteria we use to evaluate them. ***** 10 Questions to Choose the Right Brain Fitness Program for You (and a brief explanation of why each question is important)***** * 1. Are there scientists, ideally neuropsychologists, and a scientific advisory board behind the program? (Neuropsychologists specialize in measuring and understanding human cognition and brain structure and function.) * 2. Are there published, peer-reviewed scientific papers in PubMed written by those scientists? How many? (PubMed is a service of the U.S. National Library of Medicine that includes millions of citations science journals. If a scientist has not published a paper that appears in that database, he or she cannot make scientific claims.) * 3. What are the specific benefits claimed for using this program? (Some programs present the benefits in such a nebulous way that it is impossible to tell if they will have any results or not.) * 4. Does the program tell me what part of my brain or which cognitive skill I am exercising, and is there an independent assessment to measure my progress? (The question is whether the improvement experienced in the program will transfer into real life. For that to happen we need assessments that are distinct from the exercises themselves.) * 5. Is it a structured program with guidance on how many hours per week and days per week to use it? (Brain exercise is not a magic pill. You have to do the exercises in order to benefit, so you need clarity on the effort required.) * 6. Do the exercises vary and teach me something new? (The only way to exercise important parts of our brain is by tackling novel challenges.) * 7. Does the program challenge and motivate me, or does it feel like it would become easy once I learned it? (Good brain exercise requires increasing levels of difficulty) * 8. Does the program fit my personal goals? (Each individual has different goals/ needs when it comes to brain health. For example, some want to manage anxiety, others to improve short-term memory...) * 9. Does the program fit my lifestyle? (Some brain exercise programs have great short-term results but are very intense. Others may be better over time) * 10. Am I ready and willing to do the program, or would it be too stressful? (Excess stress reduces, or may even inhibit, neurogenesis-the creation of new neurons-. So, it is important to make sure not to do things that stress us in unhealthy ways.) We hope this information is useful. Now, go and exercise your brain! Copyright (c) 2007 SharpBrains
Submitted by:
Alvaro Fernandez
Alvaro Fernandez is the CEO and Co-Founder of SharpBrains, which provides the latest science-based information for Brain Health and Brain Fitness. Alvaro holds MA in Education and MBA from Stanford University. He has been teaching the class Exercising Our Brains at the San Francisco State University, and will be teaching The Science of Brain Health at UC-Berkeley Lifelong Learning Institute. Learn more at http://www.sharpbrains.com/hottopics.
Unless you have been living in a cave, you have read by now multiple articles about the brain training and brain exercise craze: sudoku, Nintendo BrainAge, multiple online games, software like MindFit and Posit Science... How do you know which of them can help you more, or whether you need any of them? Well, that's why we are publishing the SharpBrains Checklist below, to help you navigate through the overwhelming and conflicting media reports and company announcements. We have spent over 18 months interviewing scientists and reviewing available Brain Fitness and Exercise Programs worldwide, and we are going to share with you, right now, the research-based criteria we use to evaluate them. ***** 10 Questions to Choose the Right Brain Fitness Program for You (and a brief explanation of why each question is important)***** * 1. Are there scientists, ideally neuropsychologists, and a scientific advisory board behind the program? (Neuropsychologists specialize in measuring and understanding human cognition and brain structure and function.) * 2. Are there published, peer-reviewed scientific papers in PubMed written by those scientists? How many? (PubMed is a service of the U.S. National Library of Medicine that includes millions of citations science journals. If a scientist has not published a paper that appears in that database, he or she cannot make scientific claims.) * 3. What are the specific benefits claimed for using this program? (Some programs present the benefits in such a nebulous way that it is impossible to tell if they will have any results or not.) * 4. Does the program tell me what part of my brain or which cognitive skill I am exercising, and is there an independent assessment to measure my progress? (The question is whether the improvement experienced in the program will transfer into real life. For that to happen we need assessments that are distinct from the exercises themselves.) * 5. Is it a structured program with guidance on how many hours per week and days per week to use it? (Brain exercise is not a magic pill. You have to do the exercises in order to benefit, so you need clarity on the effort required.) * 6. Do the exercises vary and teach me something new? (The only way to exercise important parts of our brain is by tackling novel challenges.) * 7. Does the program challenge and motivate me, or does it feel like it would become easy once I learned it? (Good brain exercise requires increasing levels of difficulty) * 8. Does the program fit my personal goals? (Each individual has different goals/ needs when it comes to brain health. For example, some want to manage anxiety, others to improve short-term memory...) * 9. Does the program fit my lifestyle? (Some brain exercise programs have great short-term results but are very intense. Others may be better over time) * 10. Am I ready and willing to do the program, or would it be too stressful? (Excess stress reduces, or may even inhibit, neurogenesis-the creation of new neurons-. So, it is important to make sure not to do things that stress us in unhealthy ways.) We hope this information is useful. Now, go and exercise your brain! Copyright (c) 2007 SharpBrains
Submitted by:
Alvaro Fernandez
Alvaro Fernandez is the CEO and Co-Founder of SharpBrains, which provides the latest science-based information for Brain Health and Brain Fitness. Alvaro holds MA in Education and MBA from Stanford University. He has been teaching the class Exercising Our Brains at the San Francisco State University, and will be teaching The Science of Brain Health at UC-Berkeley Lifelong Learning Institute. Learn more at http://www.sharpbrains.com/hottopics.
Hobbies
10 Biggest Mistakes Grape Growers Make
Just the other day, me and a good friend of mine, was talking about the mistakes most of the grape growers make. These are basic errors that can easily fixed if the grape grower knows how to. Here are 10 things most grape growers do wrong. 1. Poor planning of your vineyard Remember, the best row direction for a grape vine is north/south. This will give the vines the maximum exposure to the much-needed sunlight and the vines need the sunlight to ripen fruit, ripen buds, and for normal photosynthesis. 2. Underestimation of the vitality of the vine Too many people construct their trellises to small and then the vine overgrows the whole trellis by so much, that the advantages of having a trellis have no effect! The main purpose of a trellis is to support the vine, but another main reason for having a trellis is to spread the shoots, so it will be exposed to enough sunlight. 3. The trellis is not constructed beforehand. I see this problem often. You plant your vine, and think you will set up the trellis later and this usually never happens before the 2nd year. What you are actually doing, is setting back the development of your vine with one full year! And normally this makes pruning, training and disease control almost impossible! Construct your trellis before you plant the vine, this will guarantee that you can start training the vine as soon as starts growing. 4. Underestimating the importance of removing site shoots when training your vine. Side shoots set back the growth of your young vine and uses energy that could have gone into growth. One very important thing to remember is that side shoots are used for developing the framework of the vine, once it reaches the trellis. Do not remove any side shoots, within 6 inches from the bottom trellis wire, once your vine reaches the this wire. 5. Summer treatments not done properly The removing of leaves, the suckering of water shoots, the twining of shoots and the thinning out of bunches (if you want larger berries) is not often done by home grape growers. Applying the correct summer treatments, will ensure that pruning during the winter will be much easier. This will also keep your vine from compacting, which will be bad for sunlight penetration, disease control and ripening of fruit, shoots and buds. 6. Choking of young training shoots When training the vine, we use a string attached to the vine and stretched to the bottom wire of the trellis. This training line (strings) is tied the incorrect way so shoot above this string was chosen to train and develop the vine. Once the stem of the vine grows thicker, and this training wire was not removed, it chokes the vine and can even kill it! I've seen 2-year-old vine die because of this. 7. Leaving way to many clusters on young vines I call this greediness (not being rude :-). This is natural, you leave as many grapes as you can on a young vine - actually, what you are doing is setting back the young vine and eventually you will struggle to develop a strong framework 8. Choosing the wrong shoots when pruning Choosing the wrong shoot will have a direct influence on the crop size. Use only strong, well matured shoots as bearers for next season's crop. If you cane prune, this is even more important! 9. Not training the vine the correct way. This is by far the biggest mistake, home grape growers make and this will influence the vine for the rest of its life. The training of a young vine must be done properly because the training method you use, will make the framework of your vine. 10. Knowledge! OK so even the most experienced grape grower, still learns new things every single day, but you must teach yourself the basic knowledge of the grape vine, before you start growing one. Most of the home grape growers make these basic mistakes. Applying the correct techniques will ensure a healthy, great looking, fruitful and happy grape vine. "The Complete Grape Growers Guide" will cover ALL of these mistakes in detail. Have a grape (great) day!
Submitted by:
Danie Wium
Danie Wium "The Complete Grape Growers Guide" at www.my-grape-vine.com, will guide you step by step, with real pitures, well illustrated drawings and easy readable text, how to grow your grape vine. View their website at: http://www.my-grape-vine.com
Just the other day, me and a good friend of mine, was talking about the mistakes most of the grape growers make. These are basic errors that can easily fixed if the grape grower knows how to. Here are 10 things most grape growers do wrong. 1. Poor planning of your vineyard Remember, the best row direction for a grape vine is north/south. This will give the vines the maximum exposure to the much-needed sunlight and the vines need the sunlight to ripen fruit, ripen buds, and for normal photosynthesis. 2. Underestimation of the vitality of the vine Too many people construct their trellises to small and then the vine overgrows the whole trellis by so much, that the advantages of having a trellis have no effect! The main purpose of a trellis is to support the vine, but another main reason for having a trellis is to spread the shoots, so it will be exposed to enough sunlight. 3. The trellis is not constructed beforehand. I see this problem often. You plant your vine, and think you will set up the trellis later and this usually never happens before the 2nd year. What you are actually doing, is setting back the development of your vine with one full year! And normally this makes pruning, training and disease control almost impossible! Construct your trellis before you plant the vine, this will guarantee that you can start training the vine as soon as starts growing. 4. Underestimating the importance of removing site shoots when training your vine. Side shoots set back the growth of your young vine and uses energy that could have gone into growth. One very important thing to remember is that side shoots are used for developing the framework of the vine, once it reaches the trellis. Do not remove any side shoots, within 6 inches from the bottom trellis wire, once your vine reaches the this wire. 5. Summer treatments not done properly The removing of leaves, the suckering of water shoots, the twining of shoots and the thinning out of bunches (if you want larger berries) is not often done by home grape growers. Applying the correct summer treatments, will ensure that pruning during the winter will be much easier. This will also keep your vine from compacting, which will be bad for sunlight penetration, disease control and ripening of fruit, shoots and buds. 6. Choking of young training shoots When training the vine, we use a string attached to the vine and stretched to the bottom wire of the trellis. This training line (strings) is tied the incorrect way so shoot above this string was chosen to train and develop the vine. Once the stem of the vine grows thicker, and this training wire was not removed, it chokes the vine and can even kill it! I've seen 2-year-old vine die because of this. 7. Leaving way to many clusters on young vines I call this greediness (not being rude :-). This is natural, you leave as many grapes as you can on a young vine - actually, what you are doing is setting back the young vine and eventually you will struggle to develop a strong framework 8. Choosing the wrong shoots when pruning Choosing the wrong shoot will have a direct influence on the crop size. Use only strong, well matured shoots as bearers for next season's crop. If you cane prune, this is even more important! 9. Not training the vine the correct way. This is by far the biggest mistake, home grape growers make and this will influence the vine for the rest of its life. The training of a young vine must be done properly because the training method you use, will make the framework of your vine. 10. Knowledge! OK so even the most experienced grape grower, still learns new things every single day, but you must teach yourself the basic knowledge of the grape vine, before you start growing one. Most of the home grape growers make these basic mistakes. Applying the correct techniques will ensure a healthy, great looking, fruitful and happy grape vine. "The Complete Grape Growers Guide" will cover ALL of these mistakes in detail. Have a grape (great) day!
Submitted by:
Danie Wium
Danie Wium "The Complete Grape Growers Guide" at www.my-grape-vine.com, will guide you step by step, with real pitures, well illustrated drawings and easy readable text, how to grow your grape vine. View their website at: http://www.my-grape-vine.com
Kids & Teens
10 Tips for Better Grades in Math
Pass these on to your high school math student:
1. Don't just aim for 70%. Aim high and shoot for 100%.
2. When doing your math homework, be neat. It does make a difference.
3. It's not just the answer that counts in math. Much of your grade is based on the intermediate steps in getting to the answer. So show all your work. Your objective should be to convince your teacher that you know how to do the problem.
4. It is important to read over the material in your math text book. Don't just focus on your homework problems.
5. Take notes from lectures, writing them neatly. When you study them, check points you need to review.
6. If you don't understand something, ask your teacher as soon as you can.
6. Watch for summaries within and at the end of assigned chapters.
7. Look for bold face and italic copy. They signify important points to remember.
8. If your homework assignments were just the even numbered questions, then do some of the others in reviewing for a test.
9. Keep up with your class on a daily basis. Try hard not to get behind.
10. Don't take the attitude that you aren't good in math. Have a positive attitude. Think, "I can do my math and I can get a good grade in math."
Pass these on to your high school math student:
1. Don't just aim for 70%. Aim high and shoot for 100%.
2. When doing your math homework, be neat. It does make a difference.
3. It's not just the answer that counts in math. Much of your grade is based on the intermediate steps in getting to the answer. So show all your work. Your objective should be to convince your teacher that you know how to do the problem.
4. It is important to read over the material in your math text book. Don't just focus on your homework problems.
5. Take notes from lectures, writing them neatly. When you study them, check points you need to review.
6. If you don't understand something, ask your teacher as soon as you can.
6. Watch for summaries within and at the end of assigned chapters.
7. Look for bold face and italic copy. They signify important points to remember.
8. If your homework assignments were just the even numbered questions, then do some of the others in reviewing for a test.
9. Keep up with your class on a daily basis. Try hard not to get behind.
10. Don't take the attitude that you aren't good in math. Have a positive attitude. Think, "I can do my math and I can get a good grade in math."
Marketing
10 Amazing Ways To Jump Start Your Sales For Big Profits
10 Amazing Web Promotion Ways To Jump Start Your Sales
1. Find a strategic business partner. Look for ones that have the same objective. You can trade leads, share marketing info, sell package deals, etc.
2. Brand your name and business. You can easily do this by just writing articles and submitting them to e-zines or web sites for republishing.
3. Start an auction on your web site. The type of auction could be related to the theme of your site. You'll draw traffic from auctioneers and bidders.
4. Remember to take a little time out of your day or week to brainstorm. New ideas are usually the difference between success and failure.
5. Model other successful business or people. I'm not saying out right copy them, but practice some of the same habits that have made them succeed.
6. Take risks to improve your business. Sometimes businesses don't want to advertise unless it's free, sometimes you have to spend money to get results.
7. Include emotional words in your advertisements. Use ones like love, security, relief, freedom, happy, satisfaction, fun, etc.
8. Ask people online to review your web site. You can use the comments you get to improve your web site or you may turn the reviewer into a customer.
9. Out source part of your workload. You'll save on most employee costs. You could out source your secretarial work, accounting, marketing, etc.
10. Combine a product and service together in a package deal. It could increase your sales. If you're selling a book, offer an hour of consulting with it.
Hello, do you have a website and sell something on the internet?
If yes, may I offer you 10 amazing ways to jump start your sales at your website!
1. Find a strategic business partner. Look for ones that have the same objective. You can trade leads, share marketing info, sell package deals, etc.
2. Brand your name and business. You can easily do this by just writing articles and submitting them to e-zines or websites for republishing.
3. Start an auction on your website. The type of auction could be related to the theme of your site. You'll draw traffic from auctioneers and bidders.
4. Remember to take a little time out of your day or week to brainstorm. New ideas are usually the difference between success and failure.
5. Model other successful business or people. I'm not saying out right copy them, but practice some of the same habits that have made them succeed.
6. Take risks to improve your business. Sometimes businesses don't want to advertise unless it's free, sometimes you have to spend money to get results.
7. Include emotional words in your advertisements. Use ones like love, security, relief, freedom, happy, satisfaction, fun, etc.
8. Ask people online to review your website. You can use the comments you get to improve your web site or you may turn the reviewer into a customer.
9. Out source part of your workload. You'll save on most employee costs. You could out source your secretarial work, accounting, marketing, etc.
10. Combine a product and service together in a package deal. It could increase your sales. If you're selling a book, offer an hour of consulting with it.
10 Amazing Web Promotion Ways To Jump Start Your Sales
1. Find a strategic business partner. Look for ones that have the same objective. You can trade leads, share marketing info, sell package deals, etc.
2. Brand your name and business. You can easily do this by just writing articles and submitting them to e-zines or web sites for republishing.
3. Start an auction on your web site. The type of auction could be related to the theme of your site. You'll draw traffic from auctioneers and bidders.
4. Remember to take a little time out of your day or week to brainstorm. New ideas are usually the difference between success and failure.
5. Model other successful business or people. I'm not saying out right copy them, but practice some of the same habits that have made them succeed.
6. Take risks to improve your business. Sometimes businesses don't want to advertise unless it's free, sometimes you have to spend money to get results.
7. Include emotional words in your advertisements. Use ones like love, security, relief, freedom, happy, satisfaction, fun, etc.
8. Ask people online to review your web site. You can use the comments you get to improve your web site or you may turn the reviewer into a customer.
9. Out source part of your workload. You'll save on most employee costs. You could out source your secretarial work, accounting, marketing, etc.
10. Combine a product and service together in a package deal. It could increase your sales. If you're selling a book, offer an hour of consulting with it.
Hello, do you have a website and sell something on the internet?
If yes, may I offer you 10 amazing ways to jump start your sales at your website!
1. Find a strategic business partner. Look for ones that have the same objective. You can trade leads, share marketing info, sell package deals, etc.
2. Brand your name and business. You can easily do this by just writing articles and submitting them to e-zines or websites for republishing.
3. Start an auction on your website. The type of auction could be related to the theme of your site. You'll draw traffic from auctioneers and bidders.
4. Remember to take a little time out of your day or week to brainstorm. New ideas are usually the difference between success and failure.
5. Model other successful business or people. I'm not saying out right copy them, but practice some of the same habits that have made them succeed.
6. Take risks to improve your business. Sometimes businesses don't want to advertise unless it's free, sometimes you have to spend money to get results.
7. Include emotional words in your advertisements. Use ones like love, security, relief, freedom, happy, satisfaction, fun, etc.
8. Ask people online to review your website. You can use the comments you get to improve your web site or you may turn the reviewer into a customer.
9. Out source part of your workload. You'll save on most employee costs. You could out source your secretarial work, accounting, marketing, etc.
10. Combine a product and service together in a package deal. It could increase your sales. If you're selling a book, offer an hour of consulting with it.
Men
10 Dating Tips for Divorced Men
What do you do when you just went through a bitter divorce and now you find yourself on the single scene once again?? Where do you start? How do you meet women again? Do you know how to properly approach beautiful women? Sometimes, it appears that the times have drastically changed since you were last single. How do you begin anew? In my line of work, I get all sorts of clients and inevitably some of the men are divorced guys looking to work the single scenes, except they have no idea where to begin. It's been a quite a while since they hit the bar scene with the fellas and approached girls and now, what perhaps used to be second nature, feels a bit foreign. It seems as if the times have changed so much. Perhaps they never great at attracting women and they feel like they lucked out with that one girl they married, and now she is gone. Oh, what will they do now?? Now, I have to be honest with you. I have never been divorced. Then again, that may be because I have never been married either. My job is to help guys from all walks of life meet women, build attraction, and have a successful dating life. My job is to help men attract women. Whether you plan to get married again or not is none of my business. If you have been out of the scene for a while, you need to become acclimated into the single scene once again. Now, I am going to lay out a specific 10 Step program to enable you to effectively join the single scene again and start attracting more women. ***STEP 1- Attitude readjustment*** It all starts with your ATTITUDE. This is the first step! You have to make a decision. I can give you all sorts of dating advice but it won't do you any good until you decide that you want to get this part of your life handled. So you have a choice: You can either sit there, bitch and complain about how the times have changed, about how it's been so long since you have done the single thing, and what a shame it is, OR you can make a decision NOW to attract a great woman (women) in your life. If you are reading through this article, perhaps you have already made this decision! This is a time to celebrate your freedom! Chances are if you were married for 15 or 20 years, you were institutionalized, sort of like the character of "Brooks" from the classic movie "The Shawshank Redemption." If you've seen the movie, you know exactly what I am talking about. "Brooks" from Shawshank wanted to choose staying in a sadistic and brutal prison rather than celebrate a freedom that came with uncertainty. When you were married, things made sense even if the circumstances were atrocious. Now, things suddenly do not make sense and this is a scary feeling. You must realize that this is a temporary state, and it will pass. You're not the first man to become divorced, nor are you the last. In fact 60% of marriages end up in a divorce in some parts of the country so you're in pretty good company. Adjust your attitude. Start to realize that you have just opened the door to a world of new possibilities. Celebrate your new found freedom and the door that has just been opened to new possibilities. ***STEP 2- Burn your old clothes. Time for a makeover*** Look, I know it's possible that you were already a sharp dresser. Anything is possible!! We live in a country that lets Geraldo on TV! In my experience, however, most men have no clue how to dress properly and when it comes to married men, forget about it. In my experience, most married men I meet, have settled into a comfort zone where the sweatshirt over plain pants look has become their calling card. If you are back on the single scene, it'd help if you started to once again take care of your appearance. It's time to a grab a few new outfits, a pair of new shoes, and do some grooming. I understand how basic this sounds but you may be astounded as to how many guys I come across who fail their basic grooming. Just make sure your hair (don't care if it's completely shaved or in a pompadour,) your beard/goatee, looks like it's been cared for. Good Breath is on top of this list. The problem is most people including many of your buddies won't tell you that you have bad breath. They'll just run away. Our first step is to make certain that we are taking care of the basics. Change the way you dress, start grooming, and look presentable. Look like you're in demand and that you know it! ***STEP 3- Start Approaching*** Make an effort to approach more women and grow your social circle. You have to start socializing more with women as well as more men. Most married couples hang out with other married couples, talk about babies, fight over bills, and watch reruns of Law & Order. It's needless to say that regardless of the conversational topics, this particular social circle isn't going to introduce you to as many single women as you'd like to meet. Hence, it'd be very wise to start creating new social circles that include single people, or at the very least, people in relationships who are still in touch with the single world. You must realize that this takes some effort on your part. You ought to start initiating conversations with more women everywhere you go. Most people immediately think of going to bars and clubs. Depending on your age, taste, likes and dislikes, you may not be a bar/club guy. That's certainly understandable. You can still make an effort to approach women during your daily activities which could range from supermarket and coffee-shops to various classes, clubs, and the gym. You also may want to give online personals a try. I'd only advise you to utilize the personals as a supplemental means to meet women, not as your only means to meet new women. ***STEP 4- Start exercising again*** I am being a bit presumptuous here. If you're doing it already, that's fantastic. Most married guys start growing horizontally. Exercise will make you FEEL better physically, emotionally, and mentally. It will also boost your self-confidence which is of the utmost importance! Plus if you join a gym, you will meet new people, females as well as males. (Not to mention that it will improve your physical appearance.) This is not a ploy to pick up women. You'll feel better because of it! ***STEP 5- Establishing New networks*** Look to create a network of single friends who really enjoy going out and meeting women. Nothing would probably encourage you more to actually enjoy going out and meeting women more than surrounding yourself with a few guys who like to have a good time and socialize. Hanging with introverts who want to sit home and maybe play a card game or two is not going to help you meet more women. If you are going to hang with guys like that, then make sure you balance it with hanging with a few animals who want to hit the outdoor life.
What do you do when you just went through a bitter divorce and now you find yourself on the single scene once again?? Where do you start? How do you meet women again? Do you know how to properly approach beautiful women? Sometimes, it appears that the times have drastically changed since you were last single. How do you begin anew? In my line of work, I get all sorts of clients and inevitably some of the men are divorced guys looking to work the single scenes, except they have no idea where to begin. It's been a quite a while since they hit the bar scene with the fellas and approached girls and now, what perhaps used to be second nature, feels a bit foreign. It seems as if the times have changed so much. Perhaps they never great at attracting women and they feel like they lucked out with that one girl they married, and now she is gone. Oh, what will they do now?? Now, I have to be honest with you. I have never been divorced. Then again, that may be because I have never been married either. My job is to help guys from all walks of life meet women, build attraction, and have a successful dating life. My job is to help men attract women. Whether you plan to get married again or not is none of my business. If you have been out of the scene for a while, you need to become acclimated into the single scene once again. Now, I am going to lay out a specific 10 Step program to enable you to effectively join the single scene again and start attracting more women. ***STEP 1- Attitude readjustment*** It all starts with your ATTITUDE. This is the first step! You have to make a decision. I can give you all sorts of dating advice but it won't do you any good until you decide that you want to get this part of your life handled. So you have a choice: You can either sit there, bitch and complain about how the times have changed, about how it's been so long since you have done the single thing, and what a shame it is, OR you can make a decision NOW to attract a great woman (women) in your life. If you are reading through this article, perhaps you have already made this decision! This is a time to celebrate your freedom! Chances are if you were married for 15 or 20 years, you were institutionalized, sort of like the character of "Brooks" from the classic movie "The Shawshank Redemption." If you've seen the movie, you know exactly what I am talking about. "Brooks" from Shawshank wanted to choose staying in a sadistic and brutal prison rather than celebrate a freedom that came with uncertainty. When you were married, things made sense even if the circumstances were atrocious. Now, things suddenly do not make sense and this is a scary feeling. You must realize that this is a temporary state, and it will pass. You're not the first man to become divorced, nor are you the last. In fact 60% of marriages end up in a divorce in some parts of the country so you're in pretty good company. Adjust your attitude. Start to realize that you have just opened the door to a world of new possibilities. Celebrate your new found freedom and the door that has just been opened to new possibilities. ***STEP 2- Burn your old clothes. Time for a makeover*** Look, I know it's possible that you were already a sharp dresser. Anything is possible!! We live in a country that lets Geraldo on TV! In my experience, however, most men have no clue how to dress properly and when it comes to married men, forget about it. In my experience, most married men I meet, have settled into a comfort zone where the sweatshirt over plain pants look has become their calling card. If you are back on the single scene, it'd help if you started to once again take care of your appearance. It's time to a grab a few new outfits, a pair of new shoes, and do some grooming. I understand how basic this sounds but you may be astounded as to how many guys I come across who fail their basic grooming. Just make sure your hair (don't care if it's completely shaved or in a pompadour,) your beard/goatee, looks like it's been cared for. Good Breath is on top of this list. The problem is most people including many of your buddies won't tell you that you have bad breath. They'll just run away. Our first step is to make certain that we are taking care of the basics. Change the way you dress, start grooming, and look presentable. Look like you're in demand and that you know it! ***STEP 3- Start Approaching*** Make an effort to approach more women and grow your social circle. You have to start socializing more with women as well as more men. Most married couples hang out with other married couples, talk about babies, fight over bills, and watch reruns of Law & Order. It's needless to say that regardless of the conversational topics, this particular social circle isn't going to introduce you to as many single women as you'd like to meet. Hence, it'd be very wise to start creating new social circles that include single people, or at the very least, people in relationships who are still in touch with the single world. You must realize that this takes some effort on your part. You ought to start initiating conversations with more women everywhere you go. Most people immediately think of going to bars and clubs. Depending on your age, taste, likes and dislikes, you may not be a bar/club guy. That's certainly understandable. You can still make an effort to approach women during your daily activities which could range from supermarket and coffee-shops to various classes, clubs, and the gym. You also may want to give online personals a try. I'd only advise you to utilize the personals as a supplemental means to meet women, not as your only means to meet new women. ***STEP 4- Start exercising again*** I am being a bit presumptuous here. If you're doing it already, that's fantastic. Most married guys start growing horizontally. Exercise will make you FEEL better physically, emotionally, and mentally. It will also boost your self-confidence which is of the utmost importance! Plus if you join a gym, you will meet new people, females as well as males. (Not to mention that it will improve your physical appearance.) This is not a ploy to pick up women. You'll feel better because of it! ***STEP 5- Establishing New networks*** Look to create a network of single friends who really enjoy going out and meeting women. Nothing would probably encourage you more to actually enjoy going out and meeting women more than surrounding yourself with a few guys who like to have a good time and socialize. Hanging with introverts who want to sit home and maybe play a card game or two is not going to help you meet more women. If you are going to hang with guys like that, then make sure you balance it with hanging with a few animals who want to hit the outdoor life.
Music & Movies
10 Tips for Buying Rap Beats Online
Buying rap beats online is quickly growing and it’s great to use the internet to bring talented producers and artists from different parts of the world together. However, like with any game, there are some players who do things right, and others who don’t. We’ve therefore compiled this simple list of tips for buying rap beats online in order to help aspiring artists out there pick the right website/producers to work with. We now have four years experience selling rap beats online through our website, www.LaCantinaProductions.com and we hope that these tips will prove useful to you! 1. Music Licenses – Understand them Know the difference between exclusive and non-exclusive licenses. An exclusive license will grant you the exclusive (hence the name) right to use the beats for your projects. A non-exclusive license will give you the right to use the beat for your musical projects, however the producer retains the right to sell the beat to other artists too. 2. Music Licenses – Know which one to buy Exclusive licenses can be expensive, but essential if you’re looking to commercially release an album. If you’re however recording a demo or mixtape, a non-exclusive license is fine, however make sure you check with the producer what rights you get as these will vary from site to site. 3. Prices, don’t pay too much! Owners of beat sites often get carried away by their big ego’s and will charge inflated prices for standard beats. A rough guideline for prices follows: Non-Exclusive Licenses - $15 - $50 Exclusive Licenses - $100 - $1000 Of course, the above prices depend on the producer’s popularity and talent. However, we would not recommend paying more than $1000 for an exclusive license bought online from someone you have never met in person. 4. Websites, only buy from trusted ones Any proper online business will make sure they have a trustworthy image. Therefore make sure that the site you’re buying from has at least one or two of these: - Full contact details, phone number, email, mailing address - Privacy Policy 5. Look for trust symbols On top of the above, the website should also have third party trust symbols. These are certifications from other companies that prove the website is trustworthy and not fraudulent. Some symbols to look for are: - BBB Certification - Paypal Verified - Shopping reviews - Hacker Safety Certifications - Antivirus Safety Certifications Also make sure these symbols link through to another page that explains what they mean and how the website in question fits the criteria. 6. Email the site and check if they reply Crazy, but certain beat sites will not bother doing this. Would you want to do business with someone who doesn’t care about talking to you? Also, this will prove that the website is a serious online business with a team of human beings running it properly. 7. Look for testimonials This is not essential, but it’s always good if you can see that others have dealt with the site before and have been satisifed with their beats. 8. Avoid producers who only use a Soundclick/MySpace page to sell beats A domain name costs less than $15 a year, surely it’s not a good sign if someone doesn’t even have the money to buy that and set up their own independent website? 9. Search for the site on Google This is a quick easy way to check a site’s reputation. Do any bad comments show up, or anything else unusual? 10. Is the site alive?
Buying rap beats online is quickly growing and it’s great to use the internet to bring talented producers and artists from different parts of the world together. However, like with any game, there are some players who do things right, and others who don’t. We’ve therefore compiled this simple list of tips for buying rap beats online in order to help aspiring artists out there pick the right website/producers to work with. We now have four years experience selling rap beats online through our website, www.LaCantinaProductions.com and we hope that these tips will prove useful to you! 1. Music Licenses – Understand them Know the difference between exclusive and non-exclusive licenses. An exclusive license will grant you the exclusive (hence the name) right to use the beats for your projects. A non-exclusive license will give you the right to use the beat for your musical projects, however the producer retains the right to sell the beat to other artists too. 2. Music Licenses – Know which one to buy Exclusive licenses can be expensive, but essential if you’re looking to commercially release an album. If you’re however recording a demo or mixtape, a non-exclusive license is fine, however make sure you check with the producer what rights you get as these will vary from site to site. 3. Prices, don’t pay too much! Owners of beat sites often get carried away by their big ego’s and will charge inflated prices for standard beats. A rough guideline for prices follows: Non-Exclusive Licenses - $15 - $50 Exclusive Licenses - $100 - $1000 Of course, the above prices depend on the producer’s popularity and talent. However, we would not recommend paying more than $1000 for an exclusive license bought online from someone you have never met in person. 4. Websites, only buy from trusted ones Any proper online business will make sure they have a trustworthy image. Therefore make sure that the site you’re buying from has at least one or two of these: - Full contact details, phone number, email, mailing address - Privacy Policy 5. Look for trust symbols On top of the above, the website should also have third party trust symbols. These are certifications from other companies that prove the website is trustworthy and not fraudulent. Some symbols to look for are: - BBB Certification - Paypal Verified - Shopping reviews - Hacker Safety Certifications - Antivirus Safety Certifications Also make sure these symbols link through to another page that explains what they mean and how the website in question fits the criteria. 6. Email the site and check if they reply Crazy, but certain beat sites will not bother doing this. Would you want to do business with someone who doesn’t care about talking to you? Also, this will prove that the website is a serious online business with a team of human beings running it properly. 7. Look for testimonials This is not essential, but it’s always good if you can see that others have dealt with the site before and have been satisifed with their beats. 8. Avoid producers who only use a Soundclick/MySpace page to sell beats A domain name costs less than $15 a year, surely it’s not a good sign if someone doesn’t even have the money to buy that and set up their own independent website? 9. Search for the site on Google This is a quick easy way to check a site’s reputation. Do any bad comments show up, or anything else unusual? 10. Is the site alive?
Online Business
Two years ago, I sat in Joel Christopher's "Master List Builder Seminar" listening to ideas on how to build my list faster. The room was filled with seasoned on-line and off-line marketers. They all told us that the money was in the list... something we all knew intuitively.
People in the room shared just about every method imaginable for building a list. They covered what worked, what didn't, and what you definitely should not do. They shared their personal experiences and the results of their latest list building tests.
A few of the speakers had tremendous impact on me. One was Paul Myers, whom I previously knew primarily from on-line discussion forums. I had also enjoyed several LONG phone calls with him. The other speaker whose message intrigued me was Frank Garon. Frank spoke of buying lists of new subscribers for less than a penny a name. He spoke of something called "co-registration."
Terry Dean also validated for me the impact writing good ezine articles can have at that seminar.
Frank Garon REVEALED that he and other top marketers regularly joined together and bought batches of tens of thousands....maybe 100,000 names. These names were gathered via on-line forms placed on high traffic websites. The forms offered more information on the types of products and services that Frank and his friends offered. The websites' visitors checked this box requesting more information, and these names (along with datestamp, IP address and other relevant information) was passed to the opt-in name purchasers.
As I listened to this talk of building a list of 100,000 in a month or less, I wondered, if it's so great, why isn't everyone doing it? The answer that later became clear is that many of the top marketers ARE doing it. It's not their only method of building a list, but it's definitely one of their most profitable.
The next question that popped into my tiny mind was, "Are these really subscribers or will I be accused of spamming if I send emails to these people?" These people do actually opt-in to receive more information about starting an on-line business. They do physically check a box requesting more information be sent to them. That does technically make them opt-ins.
Later, my coaches and mentors would share with me many SECRETS. One was that when you have access to one of these list, it's all about return on investment. We all know that names purchased via co-opt systems are less responsive. They are less responsive because the subscribers don't know you - they don't have a relationship with you.
These mentors went on to share that there was a proper way to legitimately turn these opt-in "LEADS" into subscribers. The method is very simple. In your first, and every email to them, you remind them that they requested more information of this type through an on-line form. It doesn't hurt to include the date, IP address and email address they subscribed from. Then you go on to share some fantastic information with them... maybe in the form of your ezine. In every contact with these purchased names you also include an easy method for them to unsubscribe.
If you provide genuine value, over time, you will build a relationship with many of these leads. Many will unsubscribe, but again - the important metric is return on investment. that's what you need to track. If you start out with 100,000 names but 6 months later that list has dwindled down to 10,000 or maybe even 1000, what is the lifetime value of those list members remaining? That's the question you need to ask. You answer that largely based upon what you currently earn for each subscriber on your list.
Another concept that sank into my head at Joel's workshop was the concept of building sub-lists. These are lists that are kept separated based upon the source. This allows you to send emails/offers to your lists based upon list demographics or how they were acquired.
I now have many sub-lists. These sub-lists are from articles I written, teleseminars I conducted, interviews I given, course I've authored, website forms, joint ventures, and co-registration purchases. Each list is generally set up as an autoresponder that I can send select messages to. My autoresponder system allows me to send out an unlimited number of both scheduled and unscheduled messages.
The primary system I use cost me $19 per month for an unlimited number of autoresponders with an unlimited number of messages. I can pre-schedule message for up to 24 months. This fantastic autoresponder deal is available through http://ProfitAutomation.com
ProfitAutomation.com does have very strict policies on how these autoresponders can be used to prevent spam accusation problems! There is also a limit on the number of new names you can import at a time. For that reason, I recommend that when dealing with co-registration emails you use the autoresponders at: http://Therealsecrets.com/co-reg/
I also recommend that with co-registration names you not email to them too often. I send them a few emails, spaced over several months. In those emails, I provide information of genuine value... on the topic of building an on-line business AND I invite them to join my regular ezine list. In each email, I inform them of how and why they are getting the email AND provide a convenient unsubscribe link.
Over the years, I've spent many thousands of dollars on co-registration lists. The quality has varied. The best deal I have discovered is through the "Nitro Guys." They can deliver 100,000 names in 30 days. If you want less, they have an "auto-ship plan" where they send you 25,000 names a month. These names are in CVS format which mean you can import them directly into many list management and autoresponder systems. Some systems, including ProfitAutomation.com, mentioned above, do limit the number of names you can import at a time... so read the terms of service before signing up.
I mentioned the "Nitro Guys. I was attracted to them by the following intriguing headline:
"Ever Wonder How Top Marketers Get Thousands Of Subscribers On Their Lists While Everyone Else Struggles To Just Get A Couple Hundred?"
I clicked through to their site to complete the education I had started at Joel Christopher's workshop…
They taught me all about the system a lot of top marketers use to build their lists fast. Their service provides me with a great return on investment. That's what keeps me going back. For more on their services visit: http://Therealsecrets.com/co-reg/
There are no real magic bullets. I've found the names purchased through co-registration services much less responsive than the names acquired from visitors to my website. However, I have grown to consider opt-in co-registration names to be a vital part of my marketing mix. Maybe you will too? Give it some thought. And now… you know one of the secrets to building a mailing list of 100,000 in 30 days.
People in the room shared just about every method imaginable for building a list. They covered what worked, what didn't, and what you definitely should not do. They shared their personal experiences and the results of their latest list building tests.
A few of the speakers had tremendous impact on me. One was Paul Myers, whom I previously knew primarily from on-line discussion forums. I had also enjoyed several LONG phone calls with him. The other speaker whose message intrigued me was Frank Garon. Frank spoke of buying lists of new subscribers for less than a penny a name. He spoke of something called "co-registration."
Terry Dean also validated for me the impact writing good ezine articles can have at that seminar.
Frank Garon REVEALED that he and other top marketers regularly joined together and bought batches of tens of thousands....maybe 100,000 names. These names were gathered via on-line forms placed on high traffic websites. The forms offered more information on the types of products and services that Frank and his friends offered. The websites' visitors checked this box requesting more information, and these names (along with datestamp, IP address and other relevant information) was passed to the opt-in name purchasers.
As I listened to this talk of building a list of 100,000 in a month or less, I wondered, if it's so great, why isn't everyone doing it? The answer that later became clear is that many of the top marketers ARE doing it. It's not their only method of building a list, but it's definitely one of their most profitable.
The next question that popped into my tiny mind was, "Are these really subscribers or will I be accused of spamming if I send emails to these people?" These people do actually opt-in to receive more information about starting an on-line business. They do physically check a box requesting more information be sent to them. That does technically make them opt-ins.
Later, my coaches and mentors would share with me many SECRETS. One was that when you have access to one of these list, it's all about return on investment. We all know that names purchased via co-opt systems are less responsive. They are less responsive because the subscribers don't know you - they don't have a relationship with you.
These mentors went on to share that there was a proper way to legitimately turn these opt-in "LEADS" into subscribers. The method is very simple. In your first, and every email to them, you remind them that they requested more information of this type through an on-line form. It doesn't hurt to include the date, IP address and email address they subscribed from. Then you go on to share some fantastic information with them... maybe in the form of your ezine. In every contact with these purchased names you also include an easy method for them to unsubscribe.
If you provide genuine value, over time, you will build a relationship with many of these leads. Many will unsubscribe, but again - the important metric is return on investment. that's what you need to track. If you start out with 100,000 names but 6 months later that list has dwindled down to 10,000 or maybe even 1000, what is the lifetime value of those list members remaining? That's the question you need to ask. You answer that largely based upon what you currently earn for each subscriber on your list.
Another concept that sank into my head at Joel's workshop was the concept of building sub-lists. These are lists that are kept separated based upon the source. This allows you to send emails/offers to your lists based upon list demographics or how they were acquired.
I now have many sub-lists. These sub-lists are from articles I written, teleseminars I conducted, interviews I given, course I've authored, website forms, joint ventures, and co-registration purchases. Each list is generally set up as an autoresponder that I can send select messages to. My autoresponder system allows me to send out an unlimited number of both scheduled and unscheduled messages.
The primary system I use cost me $19 per month for an unlimited number of autoresponders with an unlimited number of messages. I can pre-schedule message for up to 24 months. This fantastic autoresponder deal is available through http://ProfitAutomation.com
ProfitAutomation.com does have very strict policies on how these autoresponders can be used to prevent spam accusation problems! There is also a limit on the number of new names you can import at a time. For that reason, I recommend that when dealing with co-registration emails you use the autoresponders at: http://Therealsecrets.com/co-reg/
I also recommend that with co-registration names you not email to them too often. I send them a few emails, spaced over several months. In those emails, I provide information of genuine value... on the topic of building an on-line business AND I invite them to join my regular ezine list. In each email, I inform them of how and why they are getting the email AND provide a convenient unsubscribe link.
Over the years, I've spent many thousands of dollars on co-registration lists. The quality has varied. The best deal I have discovered is through the "Nitro Guys." They can deliver 100,000 names in 30 days. If you want less, they have an "auto-ship plan" where they send you 25,000 names a month. These names are in CVS format which mean you can import them directly into many list management and autoresponder systems. Some systems, including ProfitAutomation.com, mentioned above, do limit the number of names you can import at a time... so read the terms of service before signing up.
I mentioned the "Nitro Guys. I was attracted to them by the following intriguing headline:
"Ever Wonder How Top Marketers Get Thousands Of Subscribers On Their Lists While Everyone Else Struggles To Just Get A Couple Hundred?"
I clicked through to their site to complete the education I had started at Joel Christopher's workshop…
They taught me all about the system a lot of top marketers use to build their lists fast. Their service provides me with a great return on investment. That's what keeps me going back. For more on their services visit: http://Therealsecrets.com/co-reg/
There are no real magic bullets. I've found the names purchased through co-registration services much less responsive than the names acquired from visitors to my website. However, I have grown to consider opt-in co-registration names to be a vital part of my marketing mix. Maybe you will too? Give it some thought. And now… you know one of the secrets to building a mailing list of 100,000 in 30 days.
Link Popularity
osmousdpLink building is the process of acquiring links from relevant Web sites. Link building plays a significant role in search engine optimization (SEO). Popular search engines such as Google, Yahoo!, and MSN welcome organic links in a Web site. By implementing effective links, a Web site can have the following benefits. • Improve the quality of the Web site The whole concept of link building focuses on sharing right and comprehensive information with users. If a Web site embeds a hyperlink into it, it shows that there is some information in that link, which might be of some interest to the u... (read more)
Link building is the process of acquiring links from relevant Web sites. Link building plays a significant role in search engine optimization (SEO). Popular search engines such as Google, Yahoo!, and MSN welcome organic links in a Web site. By implementing effective links, a Web site can have the following benefits.
• Improve the quality of the Web site The whole concept of link building focuses on sharing right and comprehensive information with users. If a Web site embeds a hyperlink into it, it shows that there is some information in that link, which might be of some interest to the user. An interested user may click that link and reach the respective page in that Web site. Thus they gain more information on their topics of interest. In this way, link building helps in generating user interest and increases usability of a Web site.
• Impress search engines As mentioned above, links can play a great role in building traffic to a Web site. For search engines, a Web site that is rich with relevant external links is better than that with few or no links. The search engines attribute the link popularity of a Web site to its quality. Thus, a Web site with more backlinks is likely to score better in the search results.
• Build credibility Links are yardsticks of credibility of a business. If a user finds the hyperlink of your Web site on a popular Web site, he/she is likely to develop more confidence in your business thanks to the reputation of the partner Web site. A share of their reputation is thus transferred to your Web site. Blogs demonstrate the most practical approach to build confidence of users through links. Trusted blogs always share trustworthy links. A regular visitor to such blogs is likely to trust the links and the corresponding Web sites.
Link building is the process of acquiring links from relevant Web sites. Link building plays a significant role in search engine optimization (SEO). Popular search engines such as Google, Yahoo!, and MSN welcome organic links in a Web site. By implementing effective links, a Web site can have the following benefits.
• Improve the quality of the Web site The whole concept of link building focuses on sharing right and comprehensive information with users. If a Web site embeds a hyperlink into it, it shows that there is some information in that link, which might be of some interest to the user. An interested user may click that link and reach the respective page in that Web site. Thus they gain more information on their topics of interest. In this way, link building helps in generating user interest and increases usability of a Web site.
• Impress search engines As mentioned above, links can play a great role in building traffic to a Web site. For search engines, a Web site that is rich with relevant external links is better than that with few or no links. The search engines attribute the link popularity of a Web site to its quality. Thus, a Web site with more backlinks is likely to score better in the search results.
• Build credibility Links are yardsticks of credibility of a business. If a user finds the hyperlink of your Web site on a popular Web site, he/she is likely to develop more confidence in your business thanks to the reputation of the partner Web site. A share of their reputation is thus transferred to your Web site. Blogs demonstrate the most practical approach to build confidence of users through links. Trusted blogs always share trustworthy links. A regular visitor to such blogs is likely to trust the links and the corresponding Web sites.
Reference
June 2007
* June 17-19, 2007. Rehabilitation Engineering and Assistive Technology Society of North America, Annual Conference. Phoenix, AZ. Contact: 703/524-6686, ext. 306; e-mail: conference@resna.org; Web site: http://www .resna.org
* June 23-26, 2007. American School Counselor Association, Annual Conference. Denver, CO. Contact: 703/ 683-2722; Web site: http://www.schoolcounselor.org
July 2007
* July 20-22, 2007. Velo-Cardio-Facial Syndrome, 14th International Scientific Conference. Plano, TX. Contact: 732/238-8803; Web site: http://www.vcfsef.org
August ...
Read the rest of this article with a Free Trial at HighBeam Research
June 2007 * June 17-19, 2007. Rehabilitation Engineering and Assistive Technology Society of North America, Annual Conference. Phoenix, AZ.... 05/01/07 · More from publication
An interview with: Shernaz Garcia and Donna Sobel: preparing highly qualified teachers for increasingly diverse schools.(Interview)
Shernaz Garcia is an associate professor in multicultural special education at the University of Texas and a fellow in the L. D. Haskew... 05/01/07 by Chamberlain, Steven P. · More from publication
Creating learning communities for students with special needs.
Although most media centers support accessibility to information for students with disabilities and other special needs, some also guide the... 05/01/07 by Atkinson, Tom; Atkinson, Rhonda · More from publication
Visual supports for students with behavior and cognitive challenges.
In many schools, supports for children with a dual diagnosis of mental retardation and behavioral disorders are inadequate or nonexistent. Often... 05/01/07 by Jaime, Karen; Knowlton, Earle · More from publication
Evaluating the college transition needs of individuals with high-functioning autism spectrum disorders.
Increased attention has been given recently to the needs of students with learning and developmental disabilities who are transitioning from high... 05/01/07 by Adreon, Diane; Durocher, Jennifer Stella · More from publication
A new trick for the trade: a strategy for keeping an agenda book for secondary students.
Many students, especially those with disabilities, have difficulty in middle and high school with assignment organization and completion. This... 05/01/07 by Scott, Victoria G.; Compton, Lori · More from publication
View more »
Intervention in School & Clinic: Issues from 2007
May 2007
March 2007
January 2007
Intervention in School & Clinic: Issues from 2006
November 2006
September 2006
May 2006
March 2006
January 2006
Intervention in School & Clinic: Issues from 2005
November 2005
September 2005
May 2005
March 2005
January 2005
Intervention in School & Clinic: Issues from 2004
November 2004
September 2004
May 2004
March 200
* June 17-19, 2007. Rehabilitation Engineering and Assistive Technology Society of North America, Annual Conference. Phoenix, AZ. Contact: 703/524-6686, ext. 306; e-mail: conference@resna.org; Web site: http://www .resna.org
* June 23-26, 2007. American School Counselor Association, Annual Conference. Denver, CO. Contact: 703/ 683-2722; Web site: http://www.schoolcounselor.org
July 2007
* July 20-22, 2007. Velo-Cardio-Facial Syndrome, 14th International Scientific Conference. Plano, TX. Contact: 732/238-8803; Web site: http://www.vcfsef.org
August ...
Read the rest of this article with a Free Trial at HighBeam Research
June 2007 * June 17-19, 2007. Rehabilitation Engineering and Assistive Technology Society of North America, Annual Conference. Phoenix, AZ.... 05/01/07 · More from publication
An interview with: Shernaz Garcia and Donna Sobel: preparing highly qualified teachers for increasingly diverse schools.(Interview)
Shernaz Garcia is an associate professor in multicultural special education at the University of Texas and a fellow in the L. D. Haskew... 05/01/07 by Chamberlain, Steven P. · More from publication
Creating learning communities for students with special needs.
Although most media centers support accessibility to information for students with disabilities and other special needs, some also guide the... 05/01/07 by Atkinson, Tom; Atkinson, Rhonda · More from publication
Visual supports for students with behavior and cognitive challenges.
In many schools, supports for children with a dual diagnosis of mental retardation and behavioral disorders are inadequate or nonexistent. Often... 05/01/07 by Jaime, Karen; Knowlton, Earle · More from publication
Evaluating the college transition needs of individuals with high-functioning autism spectrum disorders.
Increased attention has been given recently to the needs of students with learning and developmental disabilities who are transitioning from high... 05/01/07 by Adreon, Diane; Durocher, Jennifer Stella · More from publication
A new trick for the trade: a strategy for keeping an agenda book for secondary students.
Many students, especially those with disabilities, have difficulty in middle and high school with assignment organization and completion. This... 05/01/07 by Scott, Victoria G.; Compton, Lori · More from publication
View more »
Intervention in School & Clinic: Issues from 2007
May 2007
March 2007
January 2007
Intervention in School & Clinic: Issues from 2006
November 2006
September 2006
May 2006
March 2006
January 2006
Intervention in School & Clinic: Issues from 2005
November 2005
September 2005
May 2005
March 2005
January 2005
Intervention in School & Clinic: Issues from 2004
November 2004
September 2004
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Art
"Postmodern blackness": Toni Morrison's 'Beloved' and the end of history - novel by Black female author
Twentieth Century Literature , Summer, 1998 by Kimberly Chabot Davis
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When they asserted that our postmodern society has reached the "end of history," theorists Fredric Jameson, Jean Baudrillard, and Francis Fukuyama launched a compelling debate that has persisted for over a decade. They argue that we no longer believe in teleological metanarratives, that our concept of history has become spatial or flattened out, and that we inhabit a perpetual present in which images of the past are merely recycled with no understanding of their original context. In short, they think that postmodern culture has lost a sense of historical consciousness, of cause and effect.
"Postmodern blackness": Toni Morrison's 'Beloved' and the end of history - novel by Black female author
Twentieth Century Literature , Summer, 1998 by Kimberly Chabot Davis
Email
Print
When they asserted that our postmodern society has reached the "end of history," theorists Fredric Jameson, Jean Baudrillard, and Francis Fukuyama launched a compelling debate that has persisted for over a decade. They argue that we no longer believe in teleological metanarratives, that our concept of history has become spatial or flattened out, and that we inhabit a perpetual present in which images of the past are merely recycled with no understanding of their original context. In short, they think that postmodern culture has lost a sense of historical consciousness, of cause and effect. Jameson, in particular, sees literary postmodernism as a by-product of this new worldview. Such a controversial stance has, of course, provoked numerous antagonists to speak out. Linda Hutcheon, for example, has written two studies of "historiographic metafiction," suggesting that much of postmodern fiction is still strongly invested in history, but more importantly in revising our sense of what history means and can accomplish. My project is to examine how Toni Morrison's acclaimed historical novel Beloved (1987) enacts a hybrid vision of history and time that sheds new light on issues addressed by Jameson and Hutcheon in their theories of the postmodern - topics such as the "fictionality" of history, the blurring of past and present, and the questioning of grand historical metanarratives. I argue that while the novel exhibits a postmodern skepticism of sweeping historical narratives, of "Truth," and of Marxist teleological notions of time as diachronic, it also retains an African American and modernist political commitment to the crucial importance of deep cultural memory, of keeping the past alive in order to construct a better future. Morrison's mediations between these two theoretical and political camps - between postmodernism and African American social protest - enable her to draw the best from both and make us question the more extremist voices asserting that our postmodern world is bereft of history.
More Articles of Interest
Violence, home, and community in Toni Morrison's 'Beloved.'
'Beloved': ideologies in conflict, improvised subjects
Looking into the self that is no self: an examination of subjectivity in...
Models of Memory and Romance: The Dual Endings of Toni Morrison's Beloved
The Story Must Go On and On: The Fantastic, Narration, and Intertextuality in...
Since the term postmodern has been at the center of many highly charged cultural debates, I am aware that describing Beloved as such, even as a "hybrid" postmodern novel, is a gesture that might draw criticism. Clearly, the novel's status as part of the African American tradition of social protest, and Morrison's investments in agency, presence, and the resurrection of authentic history, seem to make the novel incompatible with poststructuralist ideas at the root of postmodernism. Morrison herself has spoken out against a postmodernism that she associates with Jameson's terms. In my view, however, Morrison's treatment of history bears some similarity to Hutcheon's postmodern "historiographic metafiction," but her relationship to this discourse is affected by her aim to write "black-topic" texts. Morrison acknowledges that history is always fictional, always a representation, yet she is also committed to the project of recording African American history in order to heal her readers. Instead of a playful exercise in deconstructing history, Morrison's Beloved attempts to affect the contemporary world of the "real." While the novel should not simply be assimilated into the canon of postmodernism, Morrison's work should be recognized as contributing a fresh voice to the debates about postmodern history, a voice that challenges the centrism and elitism of much of postmodern theory. Beloved reminds us that history is not "over" for African Americans, who are still struggling to write the genealogies of their people and to keep a historical consciousness alive.
The relationship of African American writers and their work to the discourse of postmodernism has been hotly contested, and there has unfortunately emerged a dichotomy that I would like to question. This relationship has become even more vexed since the Nobel Prize committee bypassed postmodern guru Thomas Pynchon to select Toni Morrison as their 1993 literature winner. Morrison claimed her prize as a victory particularly for African Americans.(1) Black critics such as Barbara Christian continue to argue that Morrison's work must be understood as an expression of African American forms and traditions, and are concerned that "the power of this novel as a specifically African American text is being blunted" as it is being appropriated by white academic discourse (Christian 6). I too share her suspicion of the increasingly popular move to read Morrison's fiction through the lens of postmodernism, poststructuralism, or "white" academic theory, a tactic that underestimates the crucial importance of Toni Morrison's black cultural heritage to any interpretation of her works. While we must question the tactics of critics like Elliott Butler-Evans, who simply and somewhat blindly plot poststructuralist and postmodernist theory onto Morrison's "black-topic texts," we should be equally wary of concluding that postmodernism is a "white" phenomenon. Any claim that the lives of black people have nothing to do with postmodernism ignores the complex historical interrelationship of black protest and liberal academic discourse. As Andreas Huyssen, Kobena Mercer, and Linda Hutcheon have noted, racial liberation movements of the 1960s and 70s (as well as the feminist movement) contributed to the loosening of cultural boundaries that is seen as characteristically postmodern.(2) White liberal theorists of postmodernism and African American critics often share an oppositional relationship to the bourgeois state or to the universalizing "objectivity" of some humanist intellectuals. A rigid demarcation between postmodern texts and African American texts merely perpetuates a false dichotomy of academic theory and social protest, ignoring that they emerged in response to a similar set of lived conditions.
Twentieth Century Literature , Summer, 1998 by Kimberly Chabot Davis
When they asserted that our postmodern society has reached the "end of history," theorists Fredric Jameson, Jean Baudrillard, and Francis Fukuyama launched a compelling debate that has persisted for over a decade. They argue that we no longer believe in teleological metanarratives, that our concept of history has become spatial or flattened out, and that we inhabit a perpetual present in which images of the past are merely recycled with no understanding of their original context. In short, they think that postmodern culture has lost a sense of historical consciousness, of cause and effect.
"Postmodern blackness": Toni Morrison's 'Beloved' and the end of history - novel by Black female author
Twentieth Century Literature , Summer, 1998 by Kimberly Chabot Davis
When they asserted that our postmodern society has reached the "end of history," theorists Fredric Jameson, Jean Baudrillard, and Francis Fukuyama launched a compelling debate that has persisted for over a decade. They argue that we no longer believe in teleological metanarratives, that our concept of history has become spatial or flattened out, and that we inhabit a perpetual present in which images of the past are merely recycled with no understanding of their original context. In short, they think that postmodern culture has lost a sense of historical consciousness, of cause and effect. Jameson, in particular, sees literary postmodernism as a by-product of this new worldview. Such a controversial stance has, of course, provoked numerous antagonists to speak out. Linda Hutcheon, for example, has written two studies of "historiographic metafiction," suggesting that much of postmodern fiction is still strongly invested in history, but more importantly in revising our sense of what history means and can accomplish. My project is to examine how Toni Morrison's acclaimed historical novel Beloved (1987) enacts a hybrid vision of history and time that sheds new light on issues addressed by Jameson and Hutcheon in their theories of the postmodern - topics such as the "fictionality" of history, the blurring of past and present, and the questioning of grand historical metanarratives. I argue that while the novel exhibits a postmodern skepticism of sweeping historical narratives, of "Truth," and of Marxist teleological notions of time as diachronic, it also retains an African American and modernist political commitment to the crucial importance of deep cultural memory, of keeping the past alive in order to construct a better future. Morrison's mediations between these two theoretical and political camps - between postmodernism and African American social protest - enable her to draw the best from both and make us question the more extremist voices asserting that our postmodern world is bereft of history.
More Articles of Interest
Violence, home, and community in Toni Morrison's 'Beloved.'
'Beloved': ideologies in conflict, improvised subjects
Looking into the self that is no self: an examination of subjectivity in...
Models of Memory and Romance: The Dual Endings of Toni Morrison's Beloved
The Story Must Go On and On: The Fantastic, Narration, and Intertextuality in...
Since the term postmodern has been at the center of many highly charged cultural debates, I am aware that describing Beloved as such, even as a "hybrid" postmodern novel, is a gesture that might draw criticism. Clearly, the novel's status as part of the African American tradition of social protest, and Morrison's investments in agency, presence, and the resurrection of authentic history, seem to make the novel incompatible with poststructuralist ideas at the root of postmodernism. Morrison herself has spoken out against a postmodernism that she associates with Jameson's terms. In my view, however, Morrison's treatment of history bears some similarity to Hutcheon's postmodern "historiographic metafiction," but her relationship to this discourse is affected by her aim to write "black-topic" texts. Morrison acknowledges that history is always fictional, always a representation, yet she is also committed to the project of recording African American history in order to heal her readers. Instead of a playful exercise in deconstructing history, Morrison's Beloved attempts to affect the contemporary world of the "real." While the novel should not simply be assimilated into the canon of postmodernism, Morrison's work should be recognized as contributing a fresh voice to the debates about postmodern history, a voice that challenges the centrism and elitism of much of postmodern theory. Beloved reminds us that history is not "over" for African Americans, who are still struggling to write the genealogies of their people and to keep a historical consciousness alive.
The relationship of African American writers and their work to the discourse of postmodernism has been hotly contested, and there has unfortunately emerged a dichotomy that I would like to question. This relationship has become even more vexed since the Nobel Prize committee bypassed postmodern guru Thomas Pynchon to select Toni Morrison as their 1993 literature winner. Morrison claimed her prize as a victory particularly for African Americans.(1) Black critics such as Barbara Christian continue to argue that Morrison's work must be understood as an expression of African American forms and traditions, and are concerned that "the power of this novel as a specifically African American text is being blunted" as it is being appropriated by white academic discourse (Christian 6). I too share her suspicion of the increasingly popular move to read Morrison's fiction through the lens of postmodernism, poststructuralism, or "white" academic theory, a tactic that underestimates the crucial importance of Toni Morrison's black cultural heritage to any interpretation of her works. While we must question the tactics of critics like Elliott Butler-Evans, who simply and somewhat blindly plot poststructuralist and postmodernist theory onto Morrison's "black-topic texts," we should be equally wary of concluding that postmodernism is a "white" phenomenon. Any claim that the lives of black people have nothing to do with postmodernism ignores the complex historical interrelationship of black protest and liberal academic discourse. As Andreas Huyssen, Kobena Mercer, and Linda Hutcheon have noted, racial liberation movements of the 1960s and 70s (as well as the feminist movement) contributed to the loosening of cultural boundaries that is seen as characteristically postmodern.(2) White liberal theorists of postmodernism and African American critics often share an oppositional relationship to the bourgeois state or to the universalizing "objectivity" of some humanist intellectuals. A rigid demarcation between postmodern texts and African American texts merely perpetuates a false dichotomy of academic theory and social protest, ignoring that they emerged in response to a similar set of lived conditions.
Home & Garden
Borrowing scenery - Japanese art of shakkei - Brief Article
Country Living Gardener , Dec, 2001
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Capture a neighboring vista with these creative techniques
Imagine that you could, without cost, extend your garden out over the surrounding countryside--perhaps to include the meadow next door, even as far as the eye can see. Imagine, too, that while doing so you could incorporate only the picturesque areas, editing out all the rest. No doubt this does sound like a fantasy. But the fact is, you can have all of this if you learn to employ the Japanese art of shakkei, that is "borrowing scenery."
The name may be exotic, but the techniques involved are quite simple. Essentially, what the scenery borrowers do is to select the view that they admire, frame it, and then include in the garden elements that blur the distinction between here and there.
Capture a neighboring vista with these creative techniques
Imagine that you could, without cost, extend your garden out over the surrounding countryside--perhaps to include the meadow next door, even as far as the eye can see. Imagine, too, that while doing so you could incorporate only the picturesque areas, editing out all the rest. No doubt this does sound like a fantasy. But the fact is, you can have all of this if you learn to employ the Japanese art of shakkei, that is "borrowing scenery."
The name may be exotic, but the techniques involved are quite simple. Essentially, what the scenery borrowers do is to select the view that they admire, frame it, and then include in the garden elements that blur the distinction between here and there.
the frame
This is a case where the frame is every bit as important as the picture, for the way in which you capture the view has much to do with making it seem an integral part of your own landscape.
The Japanese, for example, often use hedges to frame a view, but when borrowing scenery they never use a formal hedge. Instead, they use an irregular screen composed of a mixture of different shrubs or trees. The reason for this is that they want the hedge to be unobtrusive. A perfectly clipped rampart of yew will funnel the vision most effectively, but it's liable to catch and hold the eye in the process, keeping the viewer from enjoying the vista.
Another trick of borrowing scenery is to use a frame that suggests a connection between garden and view. For a view of a pine wood, for example, you should consider planting a frame of pine trees. Prune away the lower limbs so that you see the view through the trunks of your own little grove, and you'll feel as though you are already in that wood (see below).
establishing links
The second step in taking possession of a view is to include features within the garden that echo the distant scenery. I saw this trick used to great effect in a garden in Sun Valley, Idaho. The garden itself was just a path that wound among clusters of aspen trees along the flank of a grassy foothill. But everywhere you came upon a view, the owners had set up jagged pinnacles of native granite. Your eye skipped from these "peaks" to the mountain peaks beyond, and you seemed to fly through the whole mountain range.
The Japanese clip evergreen shrubs into rounded mounds to mimic the swells of tree-covered hills, Likewise, they'll set a gnarled dwarf tree to one side of a view to suggest that you aren't just looking at the peak, you are there at the tree-line. Planting your garden with the flora of the region can also link it to the vista. I've landscaped my tiny front yard with tall, tousled grasses and New England meadow flowers to bond it with the neglected (but picturesque) hay field that sweeps up to the state school across the street.
water features
A water feature is the obvious link to include in a garden on the water's edge. Recently I visited a garden on the shore of the Chesapeake Bay. The swimming pool that sat between house and bay was asymmetric and rounded in profile, lined with dark gray, and edged with a recessed drain so that it seemed as if water was continually welling up and out of it. Who could tell where pool ended and bay began?
Establishing links between garden and view is useful for expanding and enriching your landscape. It also roots your creation into its setting. My hay field looks disheveled at times, but it does speak to the place in which I live.
trees and shrubs with outstanding winter structure
By stripping away foliage, winter exposes the bones not only of the garden but also of deciduous trees and shrubs. Some that seem like mediocrities during the rest of the year emerge as beauties in winter. For example, Corylus avellana 'Contorta', often called Harry Lauder's walking stick, is merely a pillow of foliage from spring through fall; winter, though, reveals the drama of its fantastically twisted branches. Dragon's claw willow (Salix matsudana 'Tortuosa') offers a similar effect on a larger scale. The birches, especially river and black birches (Betula nigra and B. lenta) have a fine-twigged grace, while the weeping forms of the Japanese maples, such as Acer palmatum dissectum 'Ever Red', exhibit almost feminine curves.
A Weeping beech (Fagus sylvatica 'Pendula') Zones 4 to 7; gray-barked weeping tree, 50' to 60' tall
Stewartia (Stewartia pseudocamellia) Zones 5 to 7; multi-trunked, smooth-barked tree 20' to 40' tall; the North's answer to crape myrtles
* River birch (Betula nigra) Zones 3 to 9; fine-twigged tree 40' to 70' tall
Crape myrtle (Lagerstroemia indica) Zones 7 to 9; large shrub 15' to 25' tall; multiple graceful, smooth-barked trunks
Dragon's claw willow (Salix matsudana 'Tortuosa') Zones 5 to 7; gnarled tree 20' to 30' tall
American hornbeam (Carpinus caroliniana) Zones 3 to 9; tree 20' to 30' tall and wide; smooth-barked, gray trunk and limbs
* Flowering dogwood (Cornus florida) Zones 5 to 9; small flat-topped tree to 20'; gray-barked horizontal branches
Country Living Gardener , Dec, 2001
Capture a neighboring vista with these creative techniques
Imagine that you could, without cost, extend your garden out over the surrounding countryside--perhaps to include the meadow next door, even as far as the eye can see. Imagine, too, that while doing so you could incorporate only the picturesque areas, editing out all the rest. No doubt this does sound like a fantasy. But the fact is, you can have all of this if you learn to employ the Japanese art of shakkei, that is "borrowing scenery."
The name may be exotic, but the techniques involved are quite simple. Essentially, what the scenery borrowers do is to select the view that they admire, frame it, and then include in the garden elements that blur the distinction between here and there.
Capture a neighboring vista with these creative techniques
Imagine that you could, without cost, extend your garden out over the surrounding countryside--perhaps to include the meadow next door, even as far as the eye can see. Imagine, too, that while doing so you could incorporate only the picturesque areas, editing out all the rest. No doubt this does sound like a fantasy. But the fact is, you can have all of this if you learn to employ the Japanese art of shakkei, that is "borrowing scenery."
The name may be exotic, but the techniques involved are quite simple. Essentially, what the scenery borrowers do is to select the view that they admire, frame it, and then include in the garden elements that blur the distinction between here and there.
the frame
This is a case where the frame is every bit as important as the picture, for the way in which you capture the view has much to do with making it seem an integral part of your own landscape.
The Japanese, for example, often use hedges to frame a view, but when borrowing scenery they never use a formal hedge. Instead, they use an irregular screen composed of a mixture of different shrubs or trees. The reason for this is that they want the hedge to be unobtrusive. A perfectly clipped rampart of yew will funnel the vision most effectively, but it's liable to catch and hold the eye in the process, keeping the viewer from enjoying the vista.
Another trick of borrowing scenery is to use a frame that suggests a connection between garden and view. For a view of a pine wood, for example, you should consider planting a frame of pine trees. Prune away the lower limbs so that you see the view through the trunks of your own little grove, and you'll feel as though you are already in that wood (see below).
establishing links
The second step in taking possession of a view is to include features within the garden that echo the distant scenery. I saw this trick used to great effect in a garden in Sun Valley, Idaho. The garden itself was just a path that wound among clusters of aspen trees along the flank of a grassy foothill. But everywhere you came upon a view, the owners had set up jagged pinnacles of native granite. Your eye skipped from these "peaks" to the mountain peaks beyond, and you seemed to fly through the whole mountain range.
The Japanese clip evergreen shrubs into rounded mounds to mimic the swells of tree-covered hills, Likewise, they'll set a gnarled dwarf tree to one side of a view to suggest that you aren't just looking at the peak, you are there at the tree-line. Planting your garden with the flora of the region can also link it to the vista. I've landscaped my tiny front yard with tall, tousled grasses and New England meadow flowers to bond it with the neglected (but picturesque) hay field that sweeps up to the state school across the street.
water features
A water feature is the obvious link to include in a garden on the water's edge. Recently I visited a garden on the shore of the Chesapeake Bay. The swimming pool that sat between house and bay was asymmetric and rounded in profile, lined with dark gray, and edged with a recessed drain so that it seemed as if water was continually welling up and out of it. Who could tell where pool ended and bay began?
Establishing links between garden and view is useful for expanding and enriching your landscape. It also roots your creation into its setting. My hay field looks disheveled at times, but it does speak to the place in which I live.
trees and shrubs with outstanding winter structure
By stripping away foliage, winter exposes the bones not only of the garden but also of deciduous trees and shrubs. Some that seem like mediocrities during the rest of the year emerge as beauties in winter. For example, Corylus avellana 'Contorta', often called Harry Lauder's walking stick, is merely a pillow of foliage from spring through fall; winter, though, reveals the drama of its fantastically twisted branches. Dragon's claw willow (Salix matsudana 'Tortuosa') offers a similar effect on a larger scale. The birches, especially river and black birches (Betula nigra and B. lenta) have a fine-twigged grace, while the weeping forms of the Japanese maples, such as Acer palmatum dissectum 'Ever Red', exhibit almost feminine curves.
A Weeping beech (Fagus sylvatica 'Pendula') Zones 4 to 7; gray-barked weeping tree, 50' to 60' tall
Stewartia (Stewartia pseudocamellia) Zones 5 to 7; multi-trunked, smooth-barked tree 20' to 40' tall; the North's answer to crape myrtles
* River birch (Betula nigra) Zones 3 to 9; fine-twigged tree 40' to 70' tall
Crape myrtle (Lagerstroemia indica) Zones 7 to 9; large shrub 15' to 25' tall; multiple graceful, smooth-barked trunks
Dragon's claw willow (Salix matsudana 'Tortuosa') Zones 5 to 7; gnarled tree 20' to 30' tall
American hornbeam (Carpinus caroliniana) Zones 3 to 9; tree 20' to 30' tall and wide; smooth-barked, gray trunk and limbs
* Flowering dogwood (Cornus florida) Zones 5 to 9; small flat-topped tree to 20'; gray-barked horizontal branches
10 Preventable Mistakes to Avoid Losing your Job
10 Preventable Mistakes to Avoid Losing your Job1 May 2009
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Written by Kyle Reddoch
Have you ever wanted to disappear after committing some stupid faux pas? If it occurs in a professional context, it could be more than embarrassing - it could cost your business or hurt your career. You want visibility in your career. However, that visibility should be a positive one. The last thing you need is a gaffe - that is, doing something (mentioned in the meaning above) that would put you in the negative spotlight. Here are 10 things to beware of:
Written by Kyle Reddoch
Have you ever wanted to disappear after committing some stupid faux pas? If it occurs in a professional context, it could be more than embarrassing - it could cost your business or hurt your career. You want visibility in your career. However, that visibility should be a positive one. The last thing you need is a gaffe - that is, doing something (mentioned in the meaning above) that would put you in the negative spotlight. Here are 10 things to beware of:
1. Misspelling someone’s name
A person’s name is one of the most important possessions - so make sure to spell it right. Nothing indicates a lack a professionalism more than misspelling a person’s name. When in doubt, ask. Most people won’t find your question annoying. In fact, they’ll be honored that you thought spelling their name was important enough to check directly.
A misspelling need not involve only a personal name, either. It might be a key term used in your organization, profession, or industry. A company’s name is also among these.
2. Mispronouncing a name
The same logic regarding spelling applies to pronunciation. As before, simple as the person directly. If you have to, make up a phonetic representation of the name and practice it with the person. Again, people won’t mind your taking up their time this way; they’ll be flattered that you care about saying their name correctly (as long as they don’t have to have the same conversation with you more that once).
3. Commenting on a personal/family photo
I once a man and a women, thought they were brother and sister, I managed to keep my mouth shut. They turned out to be father and daughter.
The mistake I avoided, however, can occur with photographs as well. If you see a personal or family photo on a person’s desk, avoid commenting on relationships. That young boy you though was a grandson could possibly just be a son. Similarly, if you know the photo is an earlier one of the person you’re meeting with, avoid comments like “You looked great back then.”
4. Asking about pregnancy
No matter how much the women looks like she’s showing, keep your mouth shut until she actually brings the subject up. If you ask, and the answer is “no”, you will have no graceful retreat. If you’re conducting an interview, you have also opened the door wide open to a discrimination lawsuit.
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5. Asking about unseen/absent spouse
Suppose last year you were at a company get together and saw your co-worker and their spouse. This year, you only see the co-worker. As with the pregnancy situation, keep our mouth shut. Don’t be in the position; asking about the spouse only to be told. “We’re divorced.”
6. Referring improperly to your boss
The same errors in determining family relationships can apply to office ones also. If you’re planning to be away and want to refer callers to our boss, that’s perfectly fine. However, make sure that your boss is okay with these referrals. More important, make sure your voicemail greeting or e-mail auto-reply makes the relationship clear. Don’t just say. “If you have any questions, please contact Kyle Reddoch at (phone number or e-mail address).” Say instead, “…please contact my supervisor/boss, Kyle Reddoch…”
7. Failing to reset your voicemail or e-mail auto-reply
When you return from time away from work, undo any absence greeting or auto-replies you’ve setup. Few things make you look dumber than having a greeting that references your return to work date from three months ago. If you think you’re going to forget, try placing a note on your phone or computer monitor.
8. Leaving a departed employee in voicemail / or on the Web
Once an employee leaves your company, remove that person from voicemail and any online directories that you may have. Leaving a person in place can make the company look foolish. Also, you might create the opportunity for an unaware caller to still leave a message for that departed employee, leaving the message to get missed.
9. Correcting the boss
Correcting your boss will rarely endear you to that person. If he or she made a mistake, try to correct it in as low-profile a way as possible. Perhaps you can talk to your boss during a break? However, you may (and should) publicly correct the boss when the boss in wrong about being wrong. In that limited circumstance, public correction is okay.
10. Displaying disunity in public
If you have disagreements with another person or department, resolve them privately. Don’t air dirty laundry to outsiders. Doing so makes your whole organization look bad.
Kyle Reddoch is the Owner of The Everyday Web Expert, a full service web design firm located in Amarillo, TX. He is also a featured writer on many blogs. He loves every minute of his life with his wonderful wife and two kids at their home in Amarillo.
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Written by Kyle Reddoch
Have you ever wanted to disappear after committing some stupid faux pas? If it occurs in a professional context, it could be more than embarrassing - it could cost your business or hurt your career. You want visibility in your career. However, that visibility should be a positive one. The last thing you need is a gaffe - that is, doing something (mentioned in the meaning above) that would put you in the negative spotlight. Here are 10 things to beware of:
Written by Kyle Reddoch
Have you ever wanted to disappear after committing some stupid faux pas? If it occurs in a professional context, it could be more than embarrassing - it could cost your business or hurt your career. You want visibility in your career. However, that visibility should be a positive one. The last thing you need is a gaffe - that is, doing something (mentioned in the meaning above) that would put you in the negative spotlight. Here are 10 things to beware of:
1. Misspelling someone’s name
A person’s name is one of the most important possessions - so make sure to spell it right. Nothing indicates a lack a professionalism more than misspelling a person’s name. When in doubt, ask. Most people won’t find your question annoying. In fact, they’ll be honored that you thought spelling their name was important enough to check directly.
A misspelling need not involve only a personal name, either. It might be a key term used in your organization, profession, or industry. A company’s name is also among these.
2. Mispronouncing a name
The same logic regarding spelling applies to pronunciation. As before, simple as the person directly. If you have to, make up a phonetic representation of the name and practice it with the person. Again, people won’t mind your taking up their time this way; they’ll be flattered that you care about saying their name correctly (as long as they don’t have to have the same conversation with you more that once).
3. Commenting on a personal/family photo
I once a man and a women, thought they were brother and sister, I managed to keep my mouth shut. They turned out to be father and daughter.
The mistake I avoided, however, can occur with photographs as well. If you see a personal or family photo on a person’s desk, avoid commenting on relationships. That young boy you though was a grandson could possibly just be a son. Similarly, if you know the photo is an earlier one of the person you’re meeting with, avoid comments like “You looked great back then.”
4. Asking about pregnancy
No matter how much the women looks like she’s showing, keep your mouth shut until she actually brings the subject up. If you ask, and the answer is “no”, you will have no graceful retreat. If you’re conducting an interview, you have also opened the door wide open to a discrimination lawsuit.
window.google_render_ad();
window.google_render_ad();
window.google_render_ad();
5. Asking about unseen/absent spouse
Suppose last year you were at a company get together and saw your co-worker and their spouse. This year, you only see the co-worker. As with the pregnancy situation, keep our mouth shut. Don’t be in the position; asking about the spouse only to be told. “We’re divorced.”
6. Referring improperly to your boss
The same errors in determining family relationships can apply to office ones also. If you’re planning to be away and want to refer callers to our boss, that’s perfectly fine. However, make sure that your boss is okay with these referrals. More important, make sure your voicemail greeting or e-mail auto-reply makes the relationship clear. Don’t just say. “If you have any questions, please contact Kyle Reddoch at (phone number or e-mail address).” Say instead, “…please contact my supervisor/boss, Kyle Reddoch…”
7. Failing to reset your voicemail or e-mail auto-reply
When you return from time away from work, undo any absence greeting or auto-replies you’ve setup. Few things make you look dumber than having a greeting that references your return to work date from three months ago. If you think you’re going to forget, try placing a note on your phone or computer monitor.
8. Leaving a departed employee in voicemail / or on the Web
Once an employee leaves your company, remove that person from voicemail and any online directories that you may have. Leaving a person in place can make the company look foolish. Also, you might create the opportunity for an unaware caller to still leave a message for that departed employee, leaving the message to get missed.
9. Correcting the boss
Correcting your boss will rarely endear you to that person. If he or she made a mistake, try to correct it in as low-profile a way as possible. Perhaps you can talk to your boss during a break? However, you may (and should) publicly correct the boss when the boss in wrong about being wrong. In that limited circumstance, public correction is okay.
10. Displaying disunity in public
If you have disagreements with another person or department, resolve them privately. Don’t air dirty laundry to outsiders. Doing so makes your whole organization look bad.
Kyle Reddoch is the Owner of The Everyday Web Expert, a full service web design firm located in Amarillo, TX. He is also a featured writer on many blogs. He loves every minute of his life with his wonderful wife and two kids at their home in Amarillo.
Co-Education, Good or Bad?
When parents consider what school to send their child to, they often first decide whether they should send their child to a single sex school or to a co-educational one.
15-year-old Tarun returned from a party a little before midnight, and charged into the bathroom to relieve himself. "What happened, why the rush?" His mother asked. "Weren't there bathrooms at the party venue?" "Yes, there were three bathrooms, but they were all locked because couples were making out in them," he exclaimed, with irritation. Tarun's mother didn't know whether she should be upset at what youngsters in schools were up to these days, or be relieved that her son wasn't much into such 'extra-curricular activities.' Some parents prefer to send their children to single sex schools, in order to minimise their contact with the opposite sex, and so, to some extent, prevent their children from indulging in such 'hanky panky.'
When parents consider what school to send their child to, they often first decide whether they should send their child to a single sex school or to a co-educational one.
15-year-old Tarun returned from a party a little before midnight, and charged into the bathroom to relieve himself. "What happened, why the rush?" His mother asked. "Weren't there bathrooms at the party venue?" "Yes, there were three bathrooms, but they were all locked because couples were making out in them," he exclaimed, with irritation. Tarun's mother didn't know whether she should be upset at what youngsters in schools were up to these days, or be relieved that her son wasn't much into such 'extra-curricular activities.' Some parents prefer to send their children to single sex schools, in order to minimise their contact with the opposite sex, and so, to some extent, prevent their children from indulging in such 'hanky panky.' First of all, it is important to understand that just by sending your child to an all-girls or all-boys school doesn't stop them from seeking out the opposite sex. You can minimise contact when your child is in school, but you cannot stop your children meeting others through tuitions, extra classes, the neighbourhood, or through friends. If your child meets someone with who she shares chemistry, and if she makes the decision to get physical with such person, there's little a parent can do. On the other hand, when you send your child to a co-educational school, your child will have exposure to the opposite sex from the outset. As a result, your child will not only feel more comfortable in the company of the opposite sex, but will also be able to handle advances better. A girl studying in a co-educational school may have ten boys in her class that are interested in going out with her, and may ignore them all, preferring to just hang out with friends. On the other hand, a girl in an all-girl's school will meet fewer boys, and fewer still will show an interest in her. Such interest, since it isn't something run-of-the-mill for her, may cause her to get carried away. However, she may still have a lot of exposure to the other sex, thanks to siblings. In this case, she may be more balanced. When making the decision of sending your child to a single sex or a co-educational school, don't base the decision on whether you want to minimise or increase your child's exposure to the opposite sex. Instead, consider the reputation of the school, the activities it offers and the quality of education and educators. Certain schools are geared towards sending students abroad for further studies. If you want your child to go abroad, this is something you may consider. Then there are other less traditional schools that focus more on activities and less on academics. If this is something that appeals to you, then give this fact more priority than the student mix. In fact, when deciding what school to send your child to, whether or not it is co-educational should be last on your list of criteria.
Pressure to perform
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15-year-old Tarun returned from a party a little before midnight, and charged into the bathroom to relieve himself. "What happened, why the rush?" His mother asked. "Weren't there bathrooms at the party venue?" "Yes, there were three bathrooms, but they were all locked because couples were making out in them," he exclaimed, with irritation. Tarun's mother didn't know whether she should be upset at what youngsters in schools were up to these days, or be relieved that her son wasn't much into such 'extra-curricular activities.' Some parents prefer to send their children to single sex schools, in order to minimise their contact with the opposite sex, and so, to some extent, prevent their children from indulging in such 'hanky panky.'
When parents consider what school to send their child to, they often first decide whether they should send their child to a single sex school or to a co-educational one.
15-year-old Tarun returned from a party a little before midnight, and charged into the bathroom to relieve himself. "What happened, why the rush?" His mother asked. "Weren't there bathrooms at the party venue?" "Yes, there were three bathrooms, but they were all locked because couples were making out in them," he exclaimed, with irritation. Tarun's mother didn't know whether she should be upset at what youngsters in schools were up to these days, or be relieved that her son wasn't much into such 'extra-curricular activities.' Some parents prefer to send their children to single sex schools, in order to minimise their contact with the opposite sex, and so, to some extent, prevent their children from indulging in such 'hanky panky.' First of all, it is important to understand that just by sending your child to an all-girls or all-boys school doesn't stop them from seeking out the opposite sex. You can minimise contact when your child is in school, but you cannot stop your children meeting others through tuitions, extra classes, the neighbourhood, or through friends. If your child meets someone with who she shares chemistry, and if she makes the decision to get physical with such person, there's little a parent can do. On the other hand, when you send your child to a co-educational school, your child will have exposure to the opposite sex from the outset. As a result, your child will not only feel more comfortable in the company of the opposite sex, but will also be able to handle advances better. A girl studying in a co-educational school may have ten boys in her class that are interested in going out with her, and may ignore them all, preferring to just hang out with friends. On the other hand, a girl in an all-girl's school will meet fewer boys, and fewer still will show an interest in her. Such interest, since it isn't something run-of-the-mill for her, may cause her to get carried away. However, she may still have a lot of exposure to the other sex, thanks to siblings. In this case, she may be more balanced. When making the decision of sending your child to a single sex or a co-educational school, don't base the decision on whether you want to minimise or increase your child's exposure to the opposite sex. Instead, consider the reputation of the school, the activities it offers and the quality of education and educators. Certain schools are geared towards sending students abroad for further studies. If you want your child to go abroad, this is something you may consider. Then there are other less traditional schools that focus more on activities and less on academics. If this is something that appeals to you, then give this fact more priority than the student mix. In fact, when deciding what school to send your child to, whether or not it is co-educational should be last on your list of criteria.
Pressure to perform
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Friendship
Friendship is a term used to denote co-operative and supportive behavior between two or more beings. In this sense, the term connotes a relationship which involves mutual knowledge, esteem, and affection and respect along with a degree of rendering service to friends in times of need or crisis. Friends will welcome each other's company and exhibit loyalty towards each other, often to the point of altruism. Their tastes will usually be similar and may converge, and they will share enjoyable activities. They will also engage in mutually helping behavior, such as exchange of advice and the sharing of hardship. A friend is someone who may often demonstrate reciprocating and reflective behaviors. Yet for many, friendship is nothing more than the trust that someone or something will not harm them.Value that is found in friendships is often the result of a friend demonstrating the following on a consistent basis:• the tendency to desire what is best for the other,• sympathy and empathy,• honesty, perhaps in situations where it may be difficult for others to speak the truth, especially in terms of pointing out the perceived faults of one's counterpart• mutual understanding.In a comparison of personal relationships, friendship is considered to be closer than association, although there is a range of degrees of intimacy in both friendships and associations. Friendship and association can be thought of as spanning across the same continuum. The study of friendship is included in sociology, anthropology, philosophy, and zoology.
Friendship is a term used to denote co-operative and supportive behavior between two or more beings. In this sense, the term connotes a relationship which involves mutual knowledge, esteem, and affection and respect along with a degree of rendering service to friends in times of need or crisis. Friends will welcome each other's company and exhibit loyalty towards each other, often to the point of altruism. Their tastes will usually be similar and may converge, and they will share enjoyable activities. They will also engage in mutually helping behavior, such as exchange of advice and the sharing of hardship. A friend is someone who may often demonstrate reciprocating and reflective behaviors. Yet for many, friendship is nothing more than the trust that someone or something will not harm them.Value that is found in friendships is often the result of a friend demonstrating the following on a consistent basis:• the tendency to desire what is best for the other,• sympathy and empathy,• honesty, perhaps in situations where it may be difficult for others to speak the truth, especially in terms of pointing out the perceived faults of one's counterpart• mutual understanding.In a comparison of personal relationships, friendship is considered to be closer than association, although there is a range of degrees of intimacy in both friendships and associations. Friendship and association can be thought of as spanning across the same continuum. The study of friendship is included in sociology, anthropology, philosophy, and zoology. Various theories of friendship have been proposed, among which are social psychology, social exchange theory, equity theory, relational dialectics, and attachment styles. See Interpersonal relationships• Friendship in historyFriendship is considered one of the central human experiences, and has been sanctified by all major religions. The Epic of Gilgamesh, a Babylonian poem that is among the earliest known literary works in history, chronicles in great depth the friendship between Gilgamesh and Enkidu. The Greco-Roman had, as paramount examples, the friendship of Orestes and Pylades, and, in Virgil's Aeneid, the friendship of Euryalus and Nisus. The Abrahamic faiths have the story of David and Jonathan. Friendship played an important role in German Romanticism. A good example for this is Schiller's Die Bürgschaft. The Christian Gospels state that Jesus Christ declared, "Greater love hath no man than this, that a man lay down his life for his friends."(John 15:13).In philosophy, Aristotle is known for his discussion (in the Nicomachean Ethics) of philia, which is usually (somewhat misleadingly) translated as "friendship," and certainly includes friendship, though is a much broader concept.Cultural variationsA group of friends consists of two or more people who are in a mutually pleasing relationship engendering a sentiment of camaraderie, exclusivity, and mutual trust. There are varying degrees of "closeness" between friends. Hence, some people choose to differentiate and categorize friendships based on this sentiment.RomeDuring the time of the Roman Empire, Cicero had his own beliefs on friendship. Cicero believed that in order to have a true friendship with someone there must be all honesty and truth. If there isn’t, then this isn’t a true friendship. In that case, friends must be one hundred percent honest with each other and put one hundred percent of their trust in the other person. Cicero also believed that for people to be friends with another person, they must do things without the expectation that their friend will have to repay them. He also believes that if a friend is about to do something wrong, and something that goes against your morals, you shouldn’t compromise your morals. You must explain why what they are going to do is wrong, and help them to see what the right thing to do is, because Cicero believes that ignorance is the cause of evil. Finally the last thing that Cicero believed was that the reason that a friendship comes to an end is because one person in that friendship has become bad. (On Friendship, Cicero)RussiaThe relationship is constructed differently in different cultures. In Russia, for example, one typically accords very few people the status of "friend". These friendships, however, make up in intensity what they lack in number. Friends are entitled to call each other by their first names alone, and to use diminutives. A norm of polite behaviour is addressing "acquaintances" by full first name plus patronymic. These could include relationships which elsewhere would be qualified as real friendships, such as workplace relationships of long standing, neighbors with whom one shares an occasional meal and visit, and so on. Physical contact between friends was expected, and friends, whether or not of the same sex, would embrace, sometimes kiss and walk in public with their arms around each other, or arm-in-arm, or hand-in-hand.AsiaIn the Middle East and Central Asia, male friendships, while less restricted than in Russia, tend also to be reserved and respectable in nature. They may use nick names and diminutive forms of their first names.Modern westIn the Western world, intimate physical contact has been sexualized in the public mind over the last one hundred years and is considered almost taboo in friendship, especially between two males. However, stylized hugging or kissing may be considered acceptable, depending on the context (see, for example, the kiss the tramp gives the kid in The Kid). In Spain and other Mediterranean countries, men may embrace each other in public and kiss each other on the cheek. This is not limited solely to older generations but rather is present throughout all generations. In young children throughout the modern Western world, friendship, usually of a homosocial nature, typically exhibits elements of a closeness and intimacy suppressed later in life in order to conform to societal standards.Decline of close friendships in U.S. civilizationAccording to a 2006 study documented in the journal The American Sociological Review, Americans are thought to be suffering a loss in the quality and quantity of close friendships since at least 1985.[1] The study states 25% of Americans have no close confidants, and the average total number of confidants per citizen has dropped to two.According to the study:• Americans' dependence on family as a safety net went up from 57% to 80%• Americans' dependence on a partner or spouse went up from 5% to 9%• Research has found a link between fewer friendships (that is strong personal relationships in general, not excluding family and partner/spousal relationships) and psychological and physiological regressionIn recent times, it is postulated modern American friendships have lost the force and importance they had in antiquity. C. S. Lewis for example, in his The Four Loves, writes:"To the Ancients, Friendship seemed the happiest and most fully human of all loves; the crown of life and the school of virtue. The modern world, in comparison, ignores it. We admit of course that besides a wife and family a man needs a few 'friends'. But the very tone of the admission, and the sort of acquaintanceships which those who make it would describe as 'friendships', show clearly that what they are talking about has very little to do with that Philía which Aristotle classified among the virtues or that Amicitia on which Cicero wrote a book."Developmental issuesTwo friendsIn the sequence of the emotional development of the individual, friendships come after parental bonding and before the pair bonding engaged in at the approach of maturity. In the intervening period between the end of early childhood and the onset of full adulthood, friendships are often the most important relationships in the emotional life of the adolescent, and are often more intense than relationships later in life[citation needed]. However making friends seems to trouble lots of people[citation needed]; having no friends can be emotionally damaging in some cases[citation needed]. Sometimes going years without a single friend can lead to suicide[citation needed]. A long time of friendship may also result in marriage, as they say[who?], too much friendship, is followed by a compromise.A study by researchers from Purdue University found that post secondary education (e.g. university) friendships last longer than the friendships before it.[citation needed]Types of friendshipsBest friend (or close friend): a person(s) with whom someone shares extremely strong interpersonal ties with as a friend.Acquaintance: similar to a friend, but sharing of emotional ties aren't present. An example would be a coworker whom you enjoy eating lunch with, but would not look to for emotional support.Romantic friendship: the very close but non-sexual friendship shared between two friends, often involving physical contact such as hugging, holding hands, and even cuddling.Soulmate: the name given to someone who is considered the ultimate, true, and eternal half of the other's soul, in which the two are and forever were meant to be together.Pen pal: a person who shares a "postal" relationship with another and regularly write via "snail mail". They may or may not have met each other in person and may share either love, friendship, or simply an acquaintence between each other.Internet friendship: a widely debated and criticized form of friendship or romance which takes place over the Internet. It is similar to a pen pal, in a sense a "technologically modern" form of pen pals, and the people may or may not have met in person. It's often considered dangerous.Comrade: means "ally", "friend", or "colleague" in a military or left-wing political connotation. This is the feeling of affinity that draws people together in time of war or when people have a mutual enemy or even a common goal. Friendship can be mistaken for comradeship. Former New York Times war correspondent Chris Hedges wrote:"We feel in wartime comradeship. We confuse this with friendship, with love. There are those, who will insist that the comradeship of war is love — the exotic glow that makes us in war feel as one people, one entity, is real, but this is part of war's intoxication. [...] Friends are predetermined; friendship takes place between men and women who possess an intellectual and emotional affinity for each other. But comradeship – that ecstatic bliss that comes with belonging to the crowd in wartime – is within our reach. We can all have comrades."[2]As a war ends, or a common enemy recedes, many comrades return to being strangers, who lack friendship and have little in common.Casual relationship or "Friends with benefits": the sexual or near-sexual and emotional relationship between two people who don't expect or demand to share a formal romantic relationship. In the U.S., this is considered "a fling".Boston marriage: a term used in the ninteenth and twentieth centuries to denote two women that lived together in the same household independent of male support. Relationships weren't necessarily sexual. It was used to quell fears of lesbians after WWI.Blood brother or blood sister: may refer to people related by birth, or a circle of friends who swear loyalty by mingling the blood of each member together.Open relationship: a relationship, usually between two people, that agree each partner is free to have sexual intercourse with others outside the relationship. When this agreement is made between a married couple, it's called an open marriage.Roommate: a person who shares a room or apartment (flat) with another person and do not share a familial or romantic relationship.Imaginary friend: a non-physical friend created by a child. It may be seen as bad behavior or even taboo (some parents even consider their child to be possessed by an evil spirit), but is most commonly regarded as harmless, typical childhood behavior. The friend may or may not be human, and commonly serves a protective purpose.LoveSee also: MarriageLove is closely related to friendship in that it involves strong interpersonal ties between two or more people. A child may love his or her parents or a man may love a woman. Love can also be used in non-personal terms such as a girl may love soccer or someone may love their favorite color.In terms of interpersonal relationships, there are two distinct types of love:1. Platonic love: considered the non-sexual relationship between two people who share strong desireable feelings for one another.2. Romantic love: considered similar to Platonic love, but involves sexual elements.Non-personal friendshipsAlthough the term initially described relations between individuals, it is at times used for political purposes to describe relations between states or peoples ("the Franco-German friendship", for example), indicating in this case an affinity or mutuality of purpose between the two nations.Regarding this aspect of international relations, Lord Palmerston said: "Therefore I say that it is a narrow policy to suppose that this country or that is to be marked out as the eternal ally or the perpetual enemy of England. We have no eternal allies, and we have no perpetual enemies. Our interests are eternal and perpetual, and those interests it is our duty to follow."[3] This is often paraphrased as: "Nations have no permanent friends and no permanent enemies. Only permanent interests."The word "friendship" can be used in political speeches as an emotive modifier. Friendship in international relationships often refers to the quality of historical, existing, or anticipated bilateral relationships.Interspecies friendship and animal friendshipFriendship as a type of interpersonal relationship is found also among animals with high intelligence, such as the higher mammals and some birds. Cross-species friendships are common between humans and domestic animals. Less common but noteworthy are friendships between an animal and another animal of a different species, such as a dog and cat.See also: ethology, altruism in animals, sociobiologyColloquial termsA number of colloquial terms have been used to describe friendship and the context in which a friendship is fostered. These are briefly described below.• A friend who supports others only when it is easy and convenient to do so is called a "fair-weather friend".• A friend who supports their own friends through emotional difficulties is a "true friend." This term also denotes a large degree of altruism, in that the true friend often sacrifices something of his or her own (usually their time and resources) in order to help the friend in need.• Friends who are sexually intimate but don't consider themselves to be dating is said to be a "casual relationship". This is also referred to as being "friends with benefits".• A "best friend" is a friend to whom one feels closest. It is usually implied that the relationship is reciprocal, but such is not always the case, and best friend relationships can often be very complex.
Friendship is a term used to denote co-operative and supportive behavior between two or more beings. In this sense, the term connotes a relationship which involves mutual knowledge, esteem, and affection and respect along with a degree of rendering service to friends in times of need or crisis. Friends will welcome each other's company and exhibit loyalty towards each other, often to the point of altruism. Their tastes will usually be similar and may converge, and they will share enjoyable activities. They will also engage in mutually helping behavior, such as exchange of advice and the sharing of hardship. A friend is someone who may often demonstrate reciprocating and reflective behaviors. Yet for many, friendship is nothing more than the trust that someone or something will not harm them.Value that is found in friendships is often the result of a friend demonstrating the following on a consistent basis:• the tendency to desire what is best for the other,• sympathy and empathy,• honesty, perhaps in situations where it may be difficult for others to speak the truth, especially in terms of pointing out the perceived faults of one's counterpart• mutual understanding.In a comparison of personal relationships, friendship is considered to be closer than association, although there is a range of degrees of intimacy in both friendships and associations. Friendship and association can be thought of as spanning across the same continuum. The study of friendship is included in sociology, anthropology, philosophy, and zoology. Various theories of friendship have been proposed, among which are social psychology, social exchange theory, equity theory, relational dialectics, and attachment styles. See Interpersonal relationships• Friendship in historyFriendship is considered one of the central human experiences, and has been sanctified by all major religions. The Epic of Gilgamesh, a Babylonian poem that is among the earliest known literary works in history, chronicles in great depth the friendship between Gilgamesh and Enkidu. The Greco-Roman had, as paramount examples, the friendship of Orestes and Pylades, and, in Virgil's Aeneid, the friendship of Euryalus and Nisus. The Abrahamic faiths have the story of David and Jonathan. Friendship played an important role in German Romanticism. A good example for this is Schiller's Die Bürgschaft. The Christian Gospels state that Jesus Christ declared, "Greater love hath no man than this, that a man lay down his life for his friends."(John 15:13).In philosophy, Aristotle is known for his discussion (in the Nicomachean Ethics) of philia, which is usually (somewhat misleadingly) translated as "friendship," and certainly includes friendship, though is a much broader concept.Cultural variationsA group of friends consists of two or more people who are in a mutually pleasing relationship engendering a sentiment of camaraderie, exclusivity, and mutual trust. There are varying degrees of "closeness" between friends. Hence, some people choose to differentiate and categorize friendships based on this sentiment.RomeDuring the time of the Roman Empire, Cicero had his own beliefs on friendship. Cicero believed that in order to have a true friendship with someone there must be all honesty and truth. If there isn’t, then this isn’t a true friendship. In that case, friends must be one hundred percent honest with each other and put one hundred percent of their trust in the other person. Cicero also believed that for people to be friends with another person, they must do things without the expectation that their friend will have to repay them. He also believes that if a friend is about to do something wrong, and something that goes against your morals, you shouldn’t compromise your morals. You must explain why what they are going to do is wrong, and help them to see what the right thing to do is, because Cicero believes that ignorance is the cause of evil. Finally the last thing that Cicero believed was that the reason that a friendship comes to an end is because one person in that friendship has become bad. (On Friendship, Cicero)RussiaThe relationship is constructed differently in different cultures. In Russia, for example, one typically accords very few people the status of "friend". These friendships, however, make up in intensity what they lack in number. Friends are entitled to call each other by their first names alone, and to use diminutives. A norm of polite behaviour is addressing "acquaintances" by full first name plus patronymic. These could include relationships which elsewhere would be qualified as real friendships, such as workplace relationships of long standing, neighbors with whom one shares an occasional meal and visit, and so on. Physical contact between friends was expected, and friends, whether or not of the same sex, would embrace, sometimes kiss and walk in public with their arms around each other, or arm-in-arm, or hand-in-hand.AsiaIn the Middle East and Central Asia, male friendships, while less restricted than in Russia, tend also to be reserved and respectable in nature. They may use nick names and diminutive forms of their first names.Modern westIn the Western world, intimate physical contact has been sexualized in the public mind over the last one hundred years and is considered almost taboo in friendship, especially between two males. However, stylized hugging or kissing may be considered acceptable, depending on the context (see, for example, the kiss the tramp gives the kid in The Kid). In Spain and other Mediterranean countries, men may embrace each other in public and kiss each other on the cheek. This is not limited solely to older generations but rather is present throughout all generations. In young children throughout the modern Western world, friendship, usually of a homosocial nature, typically exhibits elements of a closeness and intimacy suppressed later in life in order to conform to societal standards.Decline of close friendships in U.S. civilizationAccording to a 2006 study documented in the journal The American Sociological Review, Americans are thought to be suffering a loss in the quality and quantity of close friendships since at least 1985.[1] The study states 25% of Americans have no close confidants, and the average total number of confidants per citizen has dropped to two.According to the study:• Americans' dependence on family as a safety net went up from 57% to 80%• Americans' dependence on a partner or spouse went up from 5% to 9%• Research has found a link between fewer friendships (that is strong personal relationships in general, not excluding family and partner/spousal relationships) and psychological and physiological regressionIn recent times, it is postulated modern American friendships have lost the force and importance they had in antiquity. C. S. Lewis for example, in his The Four Loves, writes:"To the Ancients, Friendship seemed the happiest and most fully human of all loves; the crown of life and the school of virtue. The modern world, in comparison, ignores it. We admit of course that besides a wife and family a man needs a few 'friends'. But the very tone of the admission, and the sort of acquaintanceships which those who make it would describe as 'friendships', show clearly that what they are talking about has very little to do with that Philía which Aristotle classified among the virtues or that Amicitia on which Cicero wrote a book."Developmental issuesTwo friendsIn the sequence of the emotional development of the individual, friendships come after parental bonding and before the pair bonding engaged in at the approach of maturity. In the intervening period between the end of early childhood and the onset of full adulthood, friendships are often the most important relationships in the emotional life of the adolescent, and are often more intense than relationships later in life[citation needed]. However making friends seems to trouble lots of people[citation needed]; having no friends can be emotionally damaging in some cases[citation needed]. Sometimes going years without a single friend can lead to suicide[citation needed]. A long time of friendship may also result in marriage, as they say[who?], too much friendship, is followed by a compromise.A study by researchers from Purdue University found that post secondary education (e.g. university) friendships last longer than the friendships before it.[citation needed]Types of friendshipsBest friend (or close friend): a person(s) with whom someone shares extremely strong interpersonal ties with as a friend.Acquaintance: similar to a friend, but sharing of emotional ties aren't present. An example would be a coworker whom you enjoy eating lunch with, but would not look to for emotional support.Romantic friendship: the very close but non-sexual friendship shared between two friends, often involving physical contact such as hugging, holding hands, and even cuddling.Soulmate: the name given to someone who is considered the ultimate, true, and eternal half of the other's soul, in which the two are and forever were meant to be together.Pen pal: a person who shares a "postal" relationship with another and regularly write via "snail mail". They may or may not have met each other in person and may share either love, friendship, or simply an acquaintence between each other.Internet friendship: a widely debated and criticized form of friendship or romance which takes place over the Internet. It is similar to a pen pal, in a sense a "technologically modern" form of pen pals, and the people may or may not have met in person. It's often considered dangerous.Comrade: means "ally", "friend", or "colleague" in a military or left-wing political connotation. This is the feeling of affinity that draws people together in time of war or when people have a mutual enemy or even a common goal. Friendship can be mistaken for comradeship. Former New York Times war correspondent Chris Hedges wrote:"We feel in wartime comradeship. We confuse this with friendship, with love. There are those, who will insist that the comradeship of war is love — the exotic glow that makes us in war feel as one people, one entity, is real, but this is part of war's intoxication. [...] Friends are predetermined; friendship takes place between men and women who possess an intellectual and emotional affinity for each other. But comradeship – that ecstatic bliss that comes with belonging to the crowd in wartime – is within our reach. We can all have comrades."[2]As a war ends, or a common enemy recedes, many comrades return to being strangers, who lack friendship and have little in common.Casual relationship or "Friends with benefits": the sexual or near-sexual and emotional relationship between two people who don't expect or demand to share a formal romantic relationship. In the U.S., this is considered "a fling".Boston marriage: a term used in the ninteenth and twentieth centuries to denote two women that lived together in the same household independent of male support. Relationships weren't necessarily sexual. It was used to quell fears of lesbians after WWI.Blood brother or blood sister: may refer to people related by birth, or a circle of friends who swear loyalty by mingling the blood of each member together.Open relationship: a relationship, usually between two people, that agree each partner is free to have sexual intercourse with others outside the relationship. When this agreement is made between a married couple, it's called an open marriage.Roommate: a person who shares a room or apartment (flat) with another person and do not share a familial or romantic relationship.Imaginary friend: a non-physical friend created by a child. It may be seen as bad behavior or even taboo (some parents even consider their child to be possessed by an evil spirit), but is most commonly regarded as harmless, typical childhood behavior. The friend may or may not be human, and commonly serves a protective purpose.LoveSee also: MarriageLove is closely related to friendship in that it involves strong interpersonal ties between two or more people. A child may love his or her parents or a man may love a woman. Love can also be used in non-personal terms such as a girl may love soccer or someone may love their favorite color.In terms of interpersonal relationships, there are two distinct types of love:1. Platonic love: considered the non-sexual relationship between two people who share strong desireable feelings for one another.2. Romantic love: considered similar to Platonic love, but involves sexual elements.Non-personal friendshipsAlthough the term initially described relations between individuals, it is at times used for political purposes to describe relations between states or peoples ("the Franco-German friendship", for example), indicating in this case an affinity or mutuality of purpose between the two nations.Regarding this aspect of international relations, Lord Palmerston said: "Therefore I say that it is a narrow policy to suppose that this country or that is to be marked out as the eternal ally or the perpetual enemy of England. We have no eternal allies, and we have no perpetual enemies. Our interests are eternal and perpetual, and those interests it is our duty to follow."[3] This is often paraphrased as: "Nations have no permanent friends and no permanent enemies. Only permanent interests."The word "friendship" can be used in political speeches as an emotive modifier. Friendship in international relationships often refers to the quality of historical, existing, or anticipated bilateral relationships.Interspecies friendship and animal friendshipFriendship as a type of interpersonal relationship is found also among animals with high intelligence, such as the higher mammals and some birds. Cross-species friendships are common between humans and domestic animals. Less common but noteworthy are friendships between an animal and another animal of a different species, such as a dog and cat.See also: ethology, altruism in animals, sociobiologyColloquial termsA number of colloquial terms have been used to describe friendship and the context in which a friendship is fostered. These are briefly described below.• A friend who supports others only when it is easy and convenient to do so is called a "fair-weather friend".• A friend who supports their own friends through emotional difficulties is a "true friend." This term also denotes a large degree of altruism, in that the true friend often sacrifices something of his or her own (usually their time and resources) in order to help the friend in need.• Friends who are sexually intimate but don't consider themselves to be dating is said to be a "casual relationship". This is also referred to as being "friends with benefits".• A "best friend" is a friend to whom one feels closest. It is usually implied that the relationship is reciprocal, but such is not always the case, and best friend relationships can often be very complex.
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